Most Helpful Guy
If it's any comfort, I'm still not really over my ex, whom I broke up with six (!) years ago.
There is a risk of mythologizing your ex, who, however wonderful, is a human being. You risk using them as a comfort blanket to protect you against the world, a world that, if you engage with it, can offer you new experiences, perspectives and people.
Take care :)
Most Helpful Girl
Well, I think it's possible that you may never "get over" some break ups. You learn to live with the loss and you find ways to move on while respecting and occasionally nurturing the hole the loss left you with. The important thing is to make sure you're not perpetuating these feelings. If you're constantly thinking about it or checking up on your ex, you're perpetuating the situation and, in turn, it's continuously making you feel bad. You will heal and you will move on. It requires a lot of self-discipline, but you just have to make conscious decisions to put your overall emotional health above wanting to relive the past or mourn the loss of this person. 4 years is a long time. Stop putting yourself through that, you don't deserve it!