Girls, I'm calling you out?

Why can't you girls just say "no" plainly when someone asks you out, instead of the usual flaky s*** like "I'll think about it", "I need to see if I'm busy" or my all godly favorite, "maybe". Just tell us "no" and it saves everyone time and heartache.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Sometimes we really mean what we say ... HOWEVER, if the guy seems unreasonably clingy, jealous or suspicious when we give him a legitimate answer ... it may drive us away.

    For instance:

    Guy I was casually seeing: "Wanna come to my place Thursday?"

    Me: "I have to check my work schedule, I'll get it tomorrow." (truth)

    Guy: "It's not like I'm gonna attack you."

    (huh?)

    another instance:

    Guy (texting at 10 pm): I know this is short notice, but wanna go out tomorrow

    Me (next day): Just got your text, I was already in bed...Sorry, I've got plans tonight."

    Next time guy calls: Want to go to dinner this weekend? (it's wednesday)

    Me: I can't make it THIS weekend, I'm out of town.

    Guy: sounds hurt, says something mildly rude and never calls back

    You've got to make sure you'e a) giving a busy girl enough leeway to accomodate you, or else she'll resent that she always has to drop plans around you. And you've got to handle "rejection" that might not actually be rejection.

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    • Guys only seem clingly cause girls keep putting off going out with them. Real reason or not if your busy that week, than if you wanted to go out with him youd say "well I'm free next monday night" or whatever not I can't hang out than bye. Throw the guy a bone or tell him no. How many times are you gonna reject a guy b4 you do go out with him?

    • I'm not saying girls should just keep a guy on hold if she knows that she doesn't like him, just that sometimes guys don't awknowledge that a girl might have an unpredictable schedule as well and get mad when she can't do something with him at the drop of a hat. Like, I was trying to date a guy who had a really varying work schedule who would call me up and expect me to be available spur of the moment around his schedule, but wouldn't be understanding if I had the same problem.

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What Girls Said 4

  • psh if it's so obvious to you it means no, then it doesn't matter, now does it?

    and I'll tell you why, because it feels mean and awkward to reject someone.

    and because if you were at least somewhat friends before, you know it, we know it, it gets awkward and never the same. no matter who says, no, I won't act different. next time you see them, they avoid eye contact, refuse to talk to you, and sometimes plain ignore you. rejection doesn't feel nice, and neither does being ignored for something you felt bad doing in the first place and you can't be blamed for.

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  • Sometimes we say maybe because we really aren't sure. We don't mean anything by it...Other times we say maybe, like in my experience, is just to be a tease. I give a direct answer soon after though...

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  • Cause we don't wanna hurt your feelings on the spot lol. We want you to "think" you have a chance, then we give it a few days, and then we tell you the truth. Which is "NO." We're confussing, I know =]

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    • Trust me, though, most of us would rather just know on the spot rather than leaving it to build up for a few days before you finally tell us no....or more commonly, just ignore it like nothing happened.

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    • Seriously.. I'd rather know on the spot too.. I hate it when girls beat around the bush.

    • Was that supposed to be charming and cute? Women demand honestly from men and complain to the ends of the earth when they don't get it. Why should men settle for anything less? Grow up and be honest with people rather than jacking with their emotions.

  • Because there are quite a few guys who don't take "No" very well. It's just easier to be mild and indirect about it because you never know how the guy will take it. As soon as you reject him you're a bitch to some guys.

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What Guys Said 3

  • I once asked a girl out I really liked and I was scared as hell she said yes and it was great til she called me 5 minutes later and cancelled. You don't forget such a deflating experience like that. If she just said no that's ok, I wouldn't be remembering my heartbreak right now.

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    • Yeah, see, this is what I mean. Do girls really think they're making us feel better by "trying to make it seem like we have some hope"?

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    • No I didn't talk to her after that it was pretty standard talk and ending the convo. I didn't do or say anything weird.

    • I hear about that really frequently. Getting a "yes" to your face, but the "no" is already in the mail.

  • If you're interested in a girl, get to know her first before asking her out. Once you figure out what you have in common, etc. then you can gradually start flirting with her. If you're smart you should be able to tell if she's interested in you romantically or not. If you get too deep into the friend zone then you can probably work that to your advantage by having her introduce you to her friends, since girls who think of you as a good friend can help hook you up with their cute, single friends if you ask them nicely.

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  • Probably because they are trying to be nice about it.

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