He doesn't know what he wants. What is up with my ex?

After my breakup last yr (exes choice), he deleted me off of social media. Few months later he apologized & added me back. Then he tells a mutual friend he's reconsidering & starts snapchatting me. Bc he apologized, I answered him. Then he disappeared & told our friend "we just couldn't work out." Then a few months later, he starts stalking my Facebook, liking things every week. He sends me a Snapchat & this time I ignore it bc it was really random. Then he disappears again. Lol I'm like wtf? Hahaha, what is up with him? I don't get it! It sounds like he doesn't know what he wants. Anyone know what's up with this?

***I'm not asking people to tell me what to do or feel, but what they think his actions mean. I already know what I feel lol***


Most Helpful Guy

  • You pegged it. He doesn't no what he wants. I think in his weird way he's trying to keep you interested enough so if he can't get another girlfriend he has you to fall back on

    • We've been broken up almost a yr & he hasn't dated anyone. He said he didn't feel ready too. Too busy with his career. He's in a transition period of life.

    • Well that would explain the confusion

    • Yeah, I was also his first love & he's pretty young. We were going to get married & he changed his mind! I'm not upset with him, he sounds loss. I actually feel compassionate.

Most Helpful Girl

  • It's almost like he's trying to keep popping up in some way to keep him in your mind, so you don't forget about him, but he doesn't want to be with you *right now*. It's like he's keeping his options open. Some guys do this with exes so they can have a fall back if they're lonely or something. I knew a guy who did this sort of thing. If he pops up every once in a while, then if he actually wants to contact you, you won't be like, I thought you disappeared off the face of the planet. Like, he'll message you on FB about something you posted to try and strike up a conversation, won't necessarily be out of the blue, because he's been "interacting" by liking your posts or whatever on FB all along. Don't know if that makes any sense... OR... it could just be that he stills considers you a friend, especially since you have friends in common. Guys are so weird haha

    • Thank you! I was his first love. He dumped me bc we were "incompatible." Which is like the furthest thing from the truth. I kinda think he's still not sure he made the right decision & is missing me?

    • Oh yeah, if you were his first love and that was just a year ago, y'all are young. He's totally clueless as to what to do/what he wants Lol Unfortunately, it doesn't seem to get much better the older they get, either :/

    • Yeah, so I heard! I keep feeling like he's the kind who will wake up one day and think "Omg, what did I do? And arrive at my door. ha ha

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • You provided your own answer. He is sporadic and unpredictable.

    Don't second guess yourself. When it waddles and quacks, it's usually a duck, Hon.

    • Hahaha so I have a confused young man on my hands? Good grief! :p

    • Show All
    • You might have mentioned that! You should both get counseling together. It sounds like you have a solid base but just got scared.

    • Well we don't talk. I gave him my word that even though I didn't agree with his decision, I respected him. So I haven't contacted him or tried to convince him of otherwise since.

What Girls Said 2

  • He either wants you back but he's scared of rejection
    Or he's seeing if he has a chance OR because you did massage his ego he's now trying to make you feel like you want him by playing the disappearing game.

    • Hmmm or maybe he's trying to keep me interested "just in case?"

    • Yup, just in case. But do you want some guy playing around with you, and expecting it will keep you to be and you will be and are his "just in case"?

    • He's not doing it purpously, believe me when I say he is ignorant and inexperienced.

  • he's just confused.

    • That's what I'm thinking!

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