How long does it take you to get over someone you were in a relationship with?

AND... What really helped you move on? (e. g. time apart, immediately start looking for someone new, gym, music, etc)


Most Helpful Girl

  • Go through your paper and look for a course to take up. It doesn't matter if it's an Italian Cooking 101 type of course or learning how to speak Mandarin, but find something that is different that is in no way associated with your ex or your relationship. It's summer, so maybe look of waterskiing lessons or stand-up paddle boarding lessons or something? The main thing is getting out and getting your mind focused on something other than your feelings. Each day that you do something to turn your attention away, the more your mind heals. It might take a long time, but that's what I think is a good start. You could be meeting different people who don't know you or your ex, and it gives you something to talk about with friends or family that is different than your feelings.

    Also, read something! Get caught up in a great book and let your mind take over the words putting them in to little movie scenes in your head. Books take time, unlike just watching a movie, and using your mind is also a deterrent from your feelings.

    Take long, hot baths to loosen up your tense muscles. Your brain has created non-stop thoughts that produce feelings that unwittingly stress our bodies. If you prepare a hot bath with calming scents and low-lighting you will nurse your body back to a calm state that actually sends a message to your brain to also relax.

    I know it sounds silly, but if you live someplace where it can be done, go to a park and feel the birds or squirrels or whatever small wildlife there is. Focus on their beauty and simplicity. It's relaxing and gets you connected with a different little being that has a heartbeat. Also, being in the fresh air and taking in nature also helps calm your body and makes you sleep better. You need rest, but *normal* rest, not the depressed-stay-in-bed-all-day rest. Getting a solid night's sleep helps heal the body and mind too.

    Good luck! You'll be fine. :)


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • @klaatu51 said it the same as me it all depends , i remember it took me 3 years to get over a girl once

  • Me never I remember all my gfs, which are exactly 14

  • depends on how much i loved her then...


What Girls Said 1

  • I don't think you can time it, it varies on like why you broke up, if you it was mutual etc. So the last relationship I was in, it actually didn't take me long to get over him because I was already feeling distant towards the end of the relationship. But what helped me was spending more time with friends, focusing on myself more because in a relationship your energy is constantly on another person, so I changed that, and put myself first and improved myself.


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