I've just had my heart and dreams shattered, can someone recommend something to help me get past this rough time please?

So the love of my life of whom i thought everything was fine has not only rejected my hand in marriage but has been cheating for the past 2 months of my life since finding out i had cancer and she didn't see a future with me since then despite me helping her through depression and losing a friend and jsut everything, i don't know what to do so if anyone has any tips please offer them... please be kind :(
we've been going out for 3 year, i popped the question i thought heck if cancer doesn't kill me i've found happiness let's make it happen i realized from that moment on to move forward, and to make it all worse yesterday discovered i'm losing my job in the landscaping industry... helps to write this out thanks for any readers... times are going to be hard by the looks of things.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I am so sorry for your pain and your illness here, dear. Please, be strong and let your heart begin its own beguine of healing.
    You need to start focusing on you so you can go on and beat your cancer and when you think of what she did to you, you can tell yourself she is not worth your time of day.
    I know this may not help much but the bitterness has to overcome your sadness so you can move on now.
    Let time heal all your war wounds... I will say a prayer and wish you all the best, my friend.
    Good luck, sweet blessings. xx

    • Just saw more bad news of your Update.. hang in there, please and pray now to God. xx

    • Thanks very much :)
      i'm sure in time i'll be fine just a really rough time, thanks very much for your input though :)

    • Oh, so welcome, and hang in there, you are a strong trooper, I can tell. xx

Most Helpful Guy

  • Well, to play devils advocate, though it is certainly no excuse for her, she was probably scared that you were going to die, and subsequently hurt her, therefore, her shit-filled brain decided that the aforementioned route she took was the best choice.

    I, quite frankly, believe her to be a vacuous bitch, and if she were to have any morsel of integrity, she would have either said "yes," or at least would've had the intestinal fortitude to be blatantly honest with you when the news broke.

    Drink a beer, hell smoke a joint, if that's your style, and focus on fighting your illness, because your energy is better spent on fighting these damned mutant cells than worrying about some gutless cunt who fucked you over.

    • I guess it could of bee a excuse, i'd of rather of discussed it because at the end of the day if she felt that way and wasn't happy with me i could of kinda understood that, when she met the other guy she said it was a moment of weakness, like she was upset and he was there, i can kinda understand but well it hurt like hell :(

      I'm kinda glad she said no because at least now i'm not holding her back and she doesn't have to be tethered to some jobless, ill idiot.
      Yeah she could of told me but i guess no ones perfect eh?
      No beers for me it makes me feel ill now and don't do drugs... well ya get me haha, i guess fighting for life is my only option now it would seem, some friends are helping me but well as much as i love them they can't fill certain roles and i won't demand their attention 24/7 they have their own life :)
      just gonna have to tough it out i guess... thank you for your input it cheered me up a bit :)

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What Girls Said 2

  • wow i am sorry... sometimes it helpes to meet new people or find things to relate too... like songs and quotes... and even people

    • Music is helping a little, and friends too, i don't feel like doing much and don't have much family or much else tbh, it was just our little abode and the world but now that's empty well it isn't at all but you get me and a chance i might lose my job too, just when besides illness or minor illness in regards to actually been sick everything was going fine thank you very much though your input helped :)

    • glad i helped... its been a struggle recently for me... and it still is but i think i am getting better,,,, thank the world...

    • thse are things that have been helping me <3

  • I may not be old enough to know what you're going through and I don't know the struggles you have but I do know that you deserve way better than your cheating girlfriend. Well, she better be your ex girlfriend now because she doesn't even deserve your time or you thinking about her. So what if you have cancer? If she truly loved you then that wouldn't matter. Cancer didn't change the man you are. In a way, you found out what kind of person your girlfriend is. Now you don't have to waste any more of your time with her. It's going o be hard getting over and forgetting about her completely. When I'm feeling depressed, I write how I feel in a journal, I listen to my favorite bands, and I also surround myself with the people I love and care about. The latter helps me remember that there are people that love me and that I'm not alone. Your life may not be going how you want it to be but, and I say this because I truly believe it, you'll pull through. I know My words can't do much to change anything but you can't give up yet. It can only get better and Ms Right will find her way to you, I just know it. I hope this helped you and wasn't too touchy and too much feeling. I tend to go overboard in the sentimental pep talks :)

    • Age means little :)
      but thank you, yeah been through a bit alright, yes she is my ex certainly as much as that hurt, we'd been together almost 3 year though so i thought i knew her... like really knew her :(
      Luckily i caught it fairly early on so treatment is kinda well despite making me ill, stings more so as i had a girlfriend leave me when younger when i had another illness, i'd of thought after helping her through such a dark period and such we were strong there was never anything to prove otherwise, thank you though it didn't no and i really appreciate that :)
      yeah it's kinda hard to surround myself with people as i don't have much family left and friends are there obviously but the betrayal i just feel empty, music helps a little, i hope i will and those words have helped a bit, i've heard that many a time tbh and i thought she finally had, i've got to take the ring back now too :(
      No not at all it was an amazing read thank you really you carry on been awesome at these pep talks you'll go far :)

What Guys Said 3

  • You must let go, just let go of everything and surrender to the universe
    Once you do that, you can focus on beating cancer, and becoming the strongest version of yourself
    Once you are stronger, you will find a new companion, i am sure of it, hang in there, i will be sending positive vibes your way

  • 0|0
    • That helped a little bit thanks :)

  • You'll be fine, champ!

    • In time i guess so yeah, just feel empty and just well i don't know how to explain it tbf... i hope you never experience it once let alone i've experienced it twice being cheated on that is... thanks for your input though :)

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