Is it right for me to break up with my boyfriend cause he is jobless?

When we met, we were both working at a restaurant. I had a slightly higher position and he was a waiter. I never saw that as an issue and in my eyes we are all equal. Yes, some have higher positions than others but we're all working to make a living right? After a few months I left that jjob and decided to look for another type of work. I was jobless for about 3 months but had some money saved up so it wasn't so hard for me. My boyfriend was still working at that restaurant. I finally found a call center job so we were both working again and it was great. Sadly he lost his restaurant job bht found a new one a month later. But then he decided to try to find work in another country so he left that job and devoted his time to looking for work overseas through agencies. During the time he got scammed by the agency so he decided to stay here and find work here instead. During the time that he left his job his savings have been used so i am supporting him. I didn't really mind cause I was earning enough for two but at time it gets tiring and i know that he also feels tired and embarrassed that i have to pay for dates and all. I really really love my boyfriend and constantly encourage him. I know he's trying to find work as well and he never fails to always thank me for being so supportive and being by his side even through this tough time. I know that this isn't easy for him too. I'm sure it's hurting his ego. I am really really trying to be patient, loving and supportive in the best way that i can. We both put our best in our relationship and we're very happy. But I'm afraid of the future with him. I really don't want to leave him because of this. But if i imagine are future based on our situation now, it doesn't look so bright? If you were in my shoes would you stay? If yes, how will you handle the situation?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You guys are at a really shitty point. It sounds like you guys are really good for each other. He doesn't sound like a deadbeat at all. I think just try to tough it out. If he's working at getting a job as hard as you describe him doing then it will eventually happen unless the universe really hates his guts.

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What Guys Said 4

  • This situation is not going to last forever. As long as he is making the effort to change his situation, then he is doing everything that is within his control to change this situation. The job market is crap right now. I don't know if he got laid off, fired, or what, but there are many out there looking for that better situation. Just keep pushing him to move forward as this could very well have been beyond his control. For you to leave him during his time of need would probably make his whole world come undone. And for what?

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  • Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind.

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  • how long has he been unemployed?

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  • No don't ask me if I was in his shoes. Ask yourself that question.

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What Girls Said 5

  • As the old saying goes, everyone knows, @chickinlove "Once you start something, you have to continue it..."Or do you?
    You have become his life support now, an Enabler for him, because with him not having a job right now, no savings, you are in essence, saving the day, in a Big way.
    It can't continue. This is Not how you get ahead in life. You have worked very hard to get this far and with someone sucking on the other end of your life line, could put you out of business real fast, real quick, where you eventually have Nothing for yourself.
    Give him a time line. I know you love him or you wouldn't be helping along like you have. Tell him you have gone extensively Over your finances and he needs to find work (Stipulate a time) or No one Will... Have a future.
    If he doesn't comply, do some soul searching. Finding out now, ahead of the game, how a person is before you even think of having a future with him, is what you most likely can look forward to down the War of the Roses road because many Times... It's a full circle problem pattern.
    This is why you have to start early so you can try and nip this in the bud.
    Good luck. xx

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    • Just saw this now, sweetie.. however, better late than never... follow my advice and put an end real quick to the misery man. xx

  • i think you should be supportive to him no matter what... if you really love him you should respect him and be faithful to him

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  • I was in your same situation with an ex, except he's never had a job when we got together, he wanted to be an electoral enginneer. I was studying so I didn't have much money either only from the government. Other factors lead me to break up with him but that was definitely one of them, he got my family to pay for him at dinners, he paid for some dates with money he had but that was rare occasion because we never usually went out because we didn't have money. it's all on perspective, you can wait and see if you guys come out of this bad situation or you can decide wether you see this as your future if nothing does change.

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  • Is he completely depended on you?

    Anyway, it depends on how serious your relationship is.

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  • Is he trying to find a job?

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