Guys, Do I move on? Please help?

Hey! So we are supposed to get married next month, been broken up for 3 months now. I have done the no contact thing and finally reached out last week. He responded with very positive things and gave me hope. I have also been posting (not with guys) very happy pictures of me being out and enjoying my life. Plus I posted I was going to Vegas with a group of girls the week were to marry. The day after the email, he takes a girl out of town and post to FB (knowing my friends and family would see) of course my friends called me and told me. When I confronted him, he told me it wasn't about me and was rude. I asked to tell me honelstly if I should let him go 100%.

This was his response:"It's over. I'm hesitant to be defintive because you never know what life holds, but for the foresseable future, Yes. Just having you ask the question brought so much crashing down inside me today. Today, now, for me, the idea of us is too painful. It is taking all my will not to type out a litany of things with an all CAPS why. At the end, and I am not a place where I could understand or accept whatever answer you gave. When I can stop feeling that way maybe we will be in a position to talk, but right now I am not ready".

Is he just trying to string me along - or should I close this chapter in my life, even if I love him dearly?


  • Do I keep hope that he will come back?
    Vote A
  • Do I move on and close this chapter?
    Vote B
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
I truly appreciate you guys taking the time to answer me. I am going to move on and close this chapter in my life. I deserve better and don't have time to sit around to wait for him to make his mind up.

Thanks so much guys!


Most Helpful Guy

  • You posted on FB that you were going to go to Vegas with your group of girls the week you were supposed to get married? I don't see how it's surprising the guy spent the weekend with another girl, you pretty much stated you were going to Vegas to have some random fun to make up for not getting married.

    Even if that's not what the Vegas trip is about, that's what it's being broadcasted as on Facebook. Put yourself in his shoes, his ex-fiance posted so that everyone could see on Facebook that she's going to Vegas instead of getting married.


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What Guys Said 7

  • Wait, what? This is so wrong I'm not sure where to start. How did you end up in this position? There's gotta be some back story here.

    • Yes, long back story for sure. I just don't know how to handle the whole thing. He hasn't talked to me in 3 months, or when he would respond it would be two lines. I emailed him last week and asked him why he hasn't reached out to me. He replied with 5 paragrahs that he wasn't ready. We have seen each other in traffic a few times on our way to work, he said that he hates those days because he can't concentrate on anything he is supposed to do and then he anixiosly looks for my car the next few days. He said he would think about meeting up with me to talk in person. He knew that email would give me the slightest little bit of hope and then he takes that girl out of town the Next DAY? I personally didn't see the post, but my best friend called me to say he was out of town with her. He texted me on Sunday the moment he got home with the longetst explantion ever as to why he didn't post it to upset me. I don't beleive it. We ended things with the text I shared above and I have not responded

    • Classic case of "I can't figure out what I want" if I've ever seen it. And like a lot of guys, if they're in a position where they have to pick one or the other, they'll pick both. He knows how to push buttons and what will get an emotional rise out of you. It's sad that he's doing this, because he probably killed a good relationship with stupidity. You can bet he's telling her the same thing he's telling you. If you kept him around, he'd run to you every time a new relationship failed. You deserve better than that. You seem like a nice person and deserve happiness as much as anyone else. I truly hope things work out for you! =^.^=

      "I'm a cat that hops streams!" ~streamhopper, Scott

  • If he truly loves you he will be at your knees crying and saying sorry, no matter how confident a man is his heart will always break if he loses the things in life he loves, no more playing games just sit down and talk but if you do choose to stay with him, make sure that girl he took out is out the picture and both of you read the book

    5 love languages, this book will help anybody's relationship in a marriage

  • You should move on with life , your young and can still get a new
    beginning in life with someone new but you need to give yourself
    a chance to heal cause Rome wasn't built overnight and don't jump
    into a new relationship it's okay to have guys as friends but that
    should be the extent to your comfortable and make sure things
    got a good feel to it..

  • Yeah for your sake, it's best to let go and cut out all your ties with him and move on; it really seems like he was just stringing you along and keeping you as an option just in case nothing works for him. I'm really sorry that this happened to you and I hope you find a way to let go and move on in time

  • I say move on. You deserve to be with someone who wants you 100%, not 70.

  • How can you think about marriage when you two broke up 3 months ago. Smh
    Do yourself a favor and please move

  • Wow. How melodramatic.


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