Have I blown my chances of getting my ex back?

My ex and I broke up three months ago in April. He had been going through a lot of personal stress and thought I couldn't help. He also thought I was being too clingy. It was devastating and the hardest period of my life. After the two month mark, he reached out and we started talking again. We had a heart to heart conversation where he apologized and wanted to patch things up. Since then (about two weeks ago), we seemed to have rekindled our relationship. He reminisced of old times; he said he missed me during our time apart; he was flirty; he began kissing me and embracing me again and calling me by my pet names. Our communication was constant. What was key was reminding him of the traits he loved about me, showing him how I changed, and giving him his space. These past two weeks have brought about hesitancy on his part. With an upcoming move (though temporary for a two-year work assignment), he is wondering what the future will bring for us and if this relationship is worth pursuing. I kinda messed up last night. He is leaving for a week-long vacation with his family today. For the past three days, I've wanted to spend time with him before he left. We arranged to meet after work. But he kept me waiting and didn't text me with updates. I knew he was busy running last minute errands too, but some updates wouldve been helpful. Unfortunately, there was some sort of an accident in his neighborhood, and he couldn't leave the area because the roads were blocked. I didn't understand fully what was going on or the extent of the seriousness of the accident. I was genuinely worried. He was angry when he finally picked up the phone, though he didn't admit it. He accused me of being selfish, being concerned only with getting together. I texted this morning and asked if he was ready for this trip. I called him baby. He responded... Thanks, but why are you calling me baby? He turned his phone off and isn't getting my texts. What should I do?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • First I assume he broke up with you.

    If this is the case, he should be making 100% of the contact.

    It's a lot easier for me to deal with these kinds of break ups when it happens to men, but I'll try my best with you.

    At this point I recommend you give him space, just like @Streamhopper has suggested.

    If he feels anything towards you, which he clearly does, he will reach out to you. When he does, I suggest you set up a definite date and just have fun and enjoy eachother's company.

    You shouldn't have to worry about your relationship status at this moment... it should be up to him (the dumper) to rectify it.

    Best of luck!

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What Guys Said 1

  • I wouldn't say you're totally out of luck. But you're going to have to give him some space - absence makes the heart grow fonder, and he needs that time to think and sort of the pieces in his mind.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Let him be on his own for a while.
    The nature of men is that the more you run behind them (we do it out of concern) they think we want to rule over them or b clingy kiddish immature and what not
    Right now he is preoccupied with the vacation and obviously he is not gonna bother about you cz according to him u r pissing him off
    So just live ur life enjoy the process
    He will come back.
    Don't lose hope or get negative

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  • I would say give him a little bit of space. He seems to still be interested in trying for your relationship but you may need to make sure you are giving him a lot of space right now since he has been bothered by you being "clingy" before. Don't contact him while he's on his trip; I'm sure that if he still wants you he will come back to you.

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