He cheated on his ex-wife & that's why they got divorced - red flag? Or can people change?

I really like him


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Most Helpful Girl

  • YES, people can change. Think of all the mistakes you and others you know of have made and whether or not they feel badly about them and wish they could take them back. Also, cheating is a sign that there was something he was missing in his life or in the marriage and he probably paid a hefty price for his mistake. I am a firm believer in second chances and someone who may have had a bad experience with one woman was just that. He was obviously in a place in his life where he was screaming to get out of it, and it worked. With you, who knows? Not to say I wouldn't have my guard up, especially in the beginning, but knowing what you do know - make sure your communication with him is open at all times so he feels safe and comfortable with you, more so than he did with his ex.

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What Guys Said 8

  • Red Flag in my opinion. I know people can change, but I wouldn't always count on it.

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  • Why would you like someone who cheated on their wife? It doesn't make sense to think that he will change for since his marriage enough wasn't enough to stop him from cheating. Not saying that he can't change but just really be aware that you having feelings for him alone won't mean much as it is.

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  • I don't trust cheaters. But yes, people can change. I never understood cheaters, though. I don't think I ever will, either.

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  • I don't believe that people can change. A past record of infidelity is ALWAYS a deal breaker.

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  • People dont change... they only grow up.

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  • that's a red flag. don't do it.

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  • cheaters just haven't found the one thats all. he most likely didn't love her enough to not cheat.

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  • If that's why they got divorced then it's not a good sign, then he can't be faithful even when married but maybe he had other reasons

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What Girls Said 6

  • It's a 'Red Flag' that you have been warned that you Need to be on the Look Out and don't be so trusting by wearing your heart on your sleeve so Quickly until you See... He has proven himself.
    He shouldn't Expect you to Trust him right off the bat He needs to Understand that he has to Earn the right again, especially when you know the truth of Of... Why they got divorced.
    A zebra in some cases can 'Change' their stripes if they find the right one. And some never learn nor ever can be trusted.
    You will find out as you nurse and nurture your slow-as-you-go relationship with him so you can feel things out and See for yourself if you have any Raised doubts.
    Good luck. xx

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  • Well, it definitely depends on the person and circumstances involved but generally speaking, once a cheater always a cheater. If he was okay with cheating on his ex-wife then what makes you think he wouldn't cheat on you? That cheating mentality doesn't usually go away from what I've noticed.

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  • People can change if they really want to, all though we are only human, in order to move forward things are constantly changing. I truly believe that more than 60% of people cheat HOWEVER, doesn't mean they're going to cheat in all of their relationships, if you get what I mean. It could be a red flag, but as long as he owned up to his past mistakes then I would give it a try. If you truly want to.

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  • Red flag. He consented to divorce so the chances of him fighting for her and proving himself over a lengthly period of time are slim

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  • Well its your choice if you want to date him but honestly I don't think you would last because in fact I had cheated on a guy before (he cheated on me first so it was like revenge) and I told my recent ex that and he never trusted me afterwards. That damage our relationship to the point where I was happy we were over because if you can't trust that they won't cheat then don't bother dating. Since you know he done this know do you really want to date him knowing he might cheat on you?

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  • Always a cheater, always a cheater. But that's just my opinion. Cheating is a deal breaker for me. If you're not happy in your current relationship, break it off. Don't cheat.

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