I'm so hurt. How could someone do this?

My boyfriend has always promised he would never break up with me and that he would never hurt me. I went through a tough breakup before him and was extremely hesitant to get into a relationship with him. He begged me for months to date him and I finally fell in love enough that I couldn't say no. We dated about 7 months but I've known him longer because he liked me for so long before. Just out of the blue he broke up with me about 3 weeks ago. He hasn't contacted me since! I've been very good about not contacting him at all and I've been going out with friends and other guys - keeping very busy. But it's hitting me very hard today. How could he say he's so in love with me the day he broke up and not even ever call me again!! How could someone be so cruel. I trusted him because he told me all the time that I could! A couple of his friends have contacted me and I don't understand why. Do you think I'll ever hear from him again? I don't want to get back together with someone who could do that to me, but I just don't understand!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • When someone promises that they will never break up with you, it is a meaningless promise. I can tell somebody how I feel about them now, but I can't promise them that I will feel the same way 5 years from now.

    He probably met someone else and that is why he is not hanging on and letting go slowly. That is not what you want to hear but it is probably the truth.

    He knows that he screwed up and maintaining contact with you will remind him of that. You will probably never hear from him again.

    Don't try to forget this. Think about it and learn your lessons. Decide what you did right and what you did wrong. Ask yourself how to avoid making the same mistakes again. The answer is not to never get involved with someone again; that is an unrealistic solution.

    Dating is a long series of relationships with the wrong people, ending with a relationship with the right person.

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What Guys Said 4

  • I'm sorry to hear. As a fellow dude, with similar skeletons in my closet, he's not ready for you. He clearly loves you, but doesn't know how to deal with it.

    Ask yourself if you guys are in a healthy relationship. I broke up with my lady a few months back. Not because I didn't love her, we got to a point in our relationship where we desperately required some better communication. We're back together, but it's hard because now all the chips are on the table. However, we've decided to work on our issues.

    I don't know all the good and bad the two of you have been through, but I know if he loves you the way he says he does; just a little time apart could be healthy. Have a positive conversation with him.

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  • I think first of all you should cry a little. Cause you haven't got the time to grieve... You got in w new relationship and that douch bag did the same to you...
    For more stay single and don't get into relationships... I don't know hu this guy pursue you and then dumped you... Maybe he was an asshole...

    But let me tell you wait for the right guy.. He will treat you so right that you will feel very secure and never have to worry about anything!!!
    Guys like me are out there.. and we are rare... though!

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  • Well it's tough to say, though the chances are slim but I am sure one day he will contact you but when I can't say.

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  • I'm in the same exact situation with my ex girlfriend, OMG. You fell for them only to see it was all lies and the person didn't really care about you nor seem to have any remorse of what they've done to you i know it really hurts. People who does that just dont know what they just missed and are really immature. Moving on is going to be really hard but you have no other choice. Guilt might just be killing him I don't know but chances are he's gone and over you :(

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What Girls Said 4

  • It sounds, and I am assuming he too is "Under 18" here, dear, that he is wet behind the ears in years and may have those lovin' feelings but Doesn't... Want to be in a steady eddy relationship right now.
    He may contact you and even if it to be friends or to try again, don't trust him... He may try it again and again and this is what I call a"Full circle problem pattern."
    Good luck and hope you feel better, sweetie. xx

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  • Everyone changes and so does their feelings. Maybe he is going through problem and wants a break from relationship and he is not telling you or he stopped having feelings for you the same way he did before.. If the two couple aren’t made for each other and all the fuel or connection from both side has gone empty then they will always break up... No one know the future. Some ends up bad.. some ends up good... I have learnt lesson to control my feelings and not go deep for nobody

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  • When his friends contacted you, what did they say? They probably contacted you to see what you where up to for your ex.. If he hasn't contacted you just take it for what it is. I just went through the same thing girl its been almost a year and still no word. there is a good chance he met someone else, or he got scared. But take it for what it is.

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  • Im sorry this happened to you and he must be a sick person to mess with your heart like that. I know its hard to let go of someone especially when u thought they loved you but just keep going on with your life and focus on yourself be patient and when you least expect you'll find the man of your dreams that will show you what true love is.

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