Why do exes try to hurt you?

Even though he broke up with me in Jan and it destroyed me. He hurt me in every way possible, and initially during the breakup I was needy. I have to unfortunately see this guy because we have a child together. He treats me with upost animosity and pure scorn. He moved out May of last yr and then tried to reconcile with me in Aug. I guess he took me back so to speak. He then wanted me to not renew my lease contract at this apt. and move back in with him.

His apt. was tiiny and I told him there HAD to be some changes that would be made in order for me to go back to him, as you can prob. guess he never made those changes, and officially kicked me to the side in Jan. He basically just cut me off. I also heard and I do say heard because i dont know how true it is that he got married in mid June. He never talks about it and has not told me a thing altough my our child goes to his house one wk at a time. Although he is supposedly married he looks at me with hate and disgust and acts like I do not exist when I meet to get our boy. Why would he do this when he was the one who moved out?


Most Helpful Girl

  • He wants you to miserable too

    • since he is married, it doesn't seem he would be miserable though.. who knows?

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What Guys Said 4

  • He doesn't need to be your best friend, but he MUST be civil to you for your child's sake. Sounds to me that this guy is just and out and out twerp and you're better off without him. Now I've got to be honest, most men don't want to date women who have kids from a past marriage/relationship. When you do start dating again, don't let Baby Daddy drama wreck things. Guys may accept the child, but Baby Daddy drama, no way Jose !

    • I don't think she will want to date him again I'd he just married some chick
      Just say'n

    • I have had several men approach me although I have a child and several who wanted to date me. My son is 4 and my ex and I were in a ltr. I could understand the stigma if I had several kids by diff. men but this is not the case. I really do not think this is a stigma anymore because there are several single moms out there

  • It's a curious quirk of human psychology that we are more likely to hate people we have unjustly injured. We do it to justify how we have treated them. The thinking is like this: "I hurt this person. I am a good person. Therefore they must be a bad person."

    The worse they treated you, the worse you must be for them not to be the bad guy.

    • Tromba you're right. Thid guy sounds like a real creep.

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    • "I hurt this person. I am a good person."? How is a person good if they hurt a person? That doesn't make any sense at all. Whoever came up with that kind of thinking is a moron.

    • It's guilt assuaged by being magically inverted. There are people who think this is the psychology behind the witchcraft mania. Most of the women killed as witches were poor relations of the people accusing them of witchcraft. They felt guilty for not supporting them, perhaps even feeling psychosomatic illness as a result. They accuse the relative of being a witch, the witch is killed and they feel better.

  • Because he's a selfish little baby, upset when he doesn't get his way. He only cares about himself.

  • Those kinds of people have no soul. They get excited on hurt and pain.

    • although it does bother me when i interact with him i emotionally shut down and won't give him a reaction.

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