How poorly do you think this will go over?

My last boyfriend and I broke up this past December. We had been together almost two years and were planning on getting married. Knowing this, he made me some jewelry with silver that had been in his family for two or more generations.

In October, he started his Master's in England. We had been long distance for a while before that (we met during the summer at work and went to different universities) but he decided that the distance was too much and he couldn't take it.

We cut off all contact (we chatted for a while on FB in May/June but he stopped replying so I stopped messaging him). I'm going to be doing my Master's in his hometown. I want to give the jewelry he made me back to him because I don't feel right keeping it.

How poorly do you think that will go over? I know he'll be hurt but I can't keep it.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think it would be nice and for the best to give it back.

    Also if you two really liked each other and you're going to be closer now, why don't you get back together? lol

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 5

  • I think what your doing is a sweet gesture. It's something of his family which I would think is important to him that he would want back ( I know I would). It's up to him about how he handles it which you can't control. I think your doing the right thing.

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  • I don't think it will be that bad. well okay as a guy, any gift I give a girl, honestly like just keep it because im not gonna want it back. but hmm this gift seems to have more value than any standard gift, its been in his family for a long time, handmade.

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    • Yeah, ordinarily I wouldn't bother. I would feel terrible for keeping the family silver.

  • nah... i guess u have to return it... sorry but sounds kinda immoral in my opinion if u keep it for yerself. hope he hasn't blocked u though so u can message him and mention about this jewelry... unless if he's very mad at u, dat he won't even listen.

    but ok... if he doesn't... u win by default, jewelry's urs... if he really wanted it back guess he'd message u anyway.

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    • I mean, he broke up with me, so he's brought this all on himself. I was always going to grad school, and I just so happened to get in where he's living (and nowhere else). I tried to open the lines of communication so it wouldn't be so awkward if we saw each other but he's totally done with me. -shrugs- can't do anything else.

    • oh fuck... so jewelry's urs by default if communication's impossible now... but don't sell it, he might demand it back one day :|

  • I think you'd be doing the right thing by giving it back to him, Im sure that silver has tremendous sentimental value.

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    • I think so too. My mom thinks I'll be burning bridges though and we may have to work together in future (we're both in energy).

    • It sucks that you two got split up like that.

      Eh, Id be lying if i could tell ya what to do dude, Never been in this situation before, But, I wish you all the best with it matey.

  • You're too young for all of this.

    I think it's pretty obvious that holding onto the jewelry hurts you because it's a lingering memory and giving it back hurts him because you are returning a symbol of his love. You have to decide which is more important.

    I would say return it simply because he is the one who couldn't take it (the distance), but that's just my opinion.

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What Girls Said 4

  • Sounds like a good idea to give it back to him. I mean your going out of your way to give it back to him. I just assume it's going to be really awkward that's all.

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    • Yeah, and he has some stuff of mine I wouldn't mind getting back too.

    • I think if his ok with giving things back to you, it would be a good thing. I remember when I dumped my cheating ex, I put all his crap he brought me in garbage bag and told him to pick it up from his mates house. Felt good doing that. Leaving that garbage bag there just made me feel free and a weight just lifted off my shoulders. At that point I felt ready to move on. Maybe this may apply to you.

  • its a good idea to do this!! they have a high value and he should keep them for the one he will be with

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  • he's the one who stopped replying you, indicating he does not want anything to do with you anymore... why would you keep family-jewelry? you are doing the right thing

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  • Very poorly. Good luck !

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    • Thanks. I'm expecting it to go terribly. If it goes kind of ok, it will be a nice surprise.

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