Worse day of my life yesterday what should I do?

I was in a relationship for nearly 2 years. I loved this man ! thought he loved me to. We had a massive bust up I know it's bad be he has a girlfriend but he still ran after me , I'm very insecure and the attention he gave me made me feel like I was so special. Everything was going fine until I noticed a women had texted him. He told me it was something to do with his brother and there trying to catch her out etc... I didn't believe him I was so upset ! He then said why have you been snooping through my phone? I hadn't but he thinks I had , he said he wouldn't go near that women she's disgusting and for my to do a lie detector on him :/ . i said " yeah I've caught you ! Just in time " as I think he would've gone with her. I lost my temper and told his girlfriend about us ! He went mental ! And yesterday I rang him at work and told him to ring me or I will ring his girlfriend ! He rang me from work and he was shouting in a rage ! I couldn't understand what he was saying he was going mental ! I hung up then he rang again and we talked , he said I was insecure / trust issues etc I was crying down the phone I told him I was sorry , then he said I have lost my kid now because of you !!! I told him
he was the one cheating so his own doing ! He then said he swears on his life and his kid life he has never been near any women but me , he said don't try to get me back it's over it's done ! Then he. said you haven't lost anything ! I said I have... You. He went quiet then said he had to go back to work and we said bye. I'm hurt he's hurt everyone's hurt ! I love this man , he blocked me on whatsapp but he still got my message and phone call. I sent a message saying I'm sorry and I will always love him , I never got a reply back. Do you think he will hate me for ever? He was such a good man to me before this happened , he was a good friend I loved him. Do I just leave him alone and maybe he will come back? What do you think


Most Helpful Guy

  • I think you should give up polyamorous relationships. At the very least, stop emotionally investing yourself in them.

    I say this because you are with him (or in a relationship with someone) for 2 years while he has a girlfriend. Even if he ran to you to meet some short-term emotional/physical need, you would still need to make him choose. Its just not going to work with another woman in the relationship.

    • I know it was wrong , I felt so wanted by him and he made me feel happy , I feel guilty and lost in side , when it's he who has done all this !

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    • I feel he has manipulated me and used me for my emotions he got a kick out of it , he talked today I'm the phone I stupidly said I miss the friendship and he said well I haven't blocked you on my phone :/ I think he is still loving the fact I ran after him maybe? He didn't love me like he said I was his soul mate !! He manipulated me I think

    • Yep, he did, like for amusement on a video game. He lacks the maturity to understand he is dealing with real people with real feelings here. I'm sorry to hear you had gone through such a difficult experience.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Just because two people Breakup doesn't mean they don't and can't Makeup and that it is Goodbye, my lover forever. And with a fresh Split when you think "This is It," with your 'Relationship for nearly 2 years' and perhaps Still Counting, @Bondegreeneyes, it doesn't Mean That... He won't be back. You share history and with This, are Feelings that are Felt and of course, the Missing the Kissing will soon follow. But Not... The Constant 'Insecure/trust issues etc.'
    He is angry now, feels hurt and upset that you think he cannot be trusted. And with his 'Rang me' in this 'Rage,' things just got worse and Now... War of the Roses.
    There may or may not have been more than meets eye besides the Other past mishaps besides this Mystery woman in Question. You didn't stress. And if you Saw what you Think was him putting his hand in the cookie jar behind your back, then there may have been More in Store... Which means he looked but so far didn't touch.
    You both are in this lock horn and scorn situation where time and space and even a Break is needed, which has lead to the Breakup now.
    Do some soul searching and let things go for awhile. He needs time to get his head on and you need to do some soul searching in your own heart and head.
    I can tell you one thing, from my own Past experience, that even if he would give you a thousand and one chances, it will Always come Full circle back.. To the past and the present and This will never constitute a healthy relationship and in the end, may only leave you both With... Friends till the end Instead, maybe Not.
    However, if he comes a calling, with you still bawling, Try... No brawling, it will never be Happy harmony, especially because there are serious issues that desperately need to be addressed here, dear.
    Good luck. xx


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • look out for the most important person.. you!


What Girls Said 3

  • I am sorry you are going through so much pain but he should have been honest with you. You deserve a person who is upfront about his actions. He won't hate you. Don't do anything. It seems like his life is a mess. If he deals with his shit and comes back you should demand full disclosure. It is better to know where you stand.

  • He is a compulsive, manipulative liar. I personally wouldn't trust a word that comes out of his mouth. My sister married and divorced someone like that, but 10x worse. She is STILL dealing with his stupid ass. Leave while you can (you should be glad that you don't have a kid with him), he sounds like a pain in the ass.

    • Thank you , I'm glad I told his girlfriend but now I'm feeling guilty , I feel
      Lost in side , I told him why didn't he just ended it with me why keep it going on if he wants something else , we only saw each other once a month ! I just don't know how to feel right now x

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    • He was shouting saying it's not fair on his girlfriend !! I told him he didn't care about her because he wouldn't have done it and he was unhappy ! He then said I was dealing with my own problems of unhappiness , and o have lost my child now and all of her family knows etc and so does his mum. I thought what about me? Then he said if I cared I wouldn't have done it , I'm so mixed up at the moment I really am

    • Trust me... He is trying to blame all of this on you, but in reality it is all his fault and he just wants to point the blame on you. He should have never cheated on his girlfriend, now it is all backfiring on him. Karma is a huge bitch. He is just mad that he got caught.

  • Look at the ugly situation you wrapped yourself up in.
    What good can come from this?

    Are you really that insecure that you want to be 2nd to someone else?

    As long as that person acts as if you are their world, you're okay with coming after someone else?

    You need to find your self worth!
    It does not lie in how others make you temporarily feel or the fantastic comments you hear from another.
    It lies within you.

    You have to love yourself and things you cannot change.
    You have to accept yourself.
    If you're searching someone else to make you happy... they will not!
    You have to be contented with yourself in general.
    Another person will only build on the happiness you feel within you.

    Get out of this ugly situation!
    The last thing you should do it try to be in a relationship with someone else (especially someone that is taken for that matter).
    Don't you see you're adding more stress? and becoming more insecure out of this?


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