Breakup advice?

So I broke up with my girlfriend of 2 years a couple days ago and it really sucks because I didn't do it on any concrete reasons. I was just losing intrest in her, and she has never really been my type. She was super loving and nice, but I like girls that are a little bit more serious and experienced (she was the most innocent girl you can imagine). I guess I could no longer ignore these things so I broke up with her after thinking it over for a week and telling her how I felt (minus the attraction part). I am having the usual mood swings of happiness (because I'm now independent) and sadness (because I am alone and we have so many memories together, plus I broke her heart). I feel like i did the right thing instead of dragging it on, but I feel so alone now, and I can't help regretting it too. Any advice?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I mean, you have every right to pursue a girl you're interested in, but it was really reckless of you to jump into a relationship that you knew from the beginning you weren't really interested in. It's inconsiderate to the girl, who will rack her mind wondering where she went wrong.

    You cut both of your losses short; I would say take some time off and get to know yourself better. You don't always need to BE in a relationship. Hang out with friends, travel a bit and pursue someone you're ACTUALLY interested in.

    • Thanks! I realized that now, but I don't regret dating her because we were very compatible, but she isn't the one for me. I guess I had just given up the hope of finding the right girl for me, and I just settled for her and forced myself to be attracted, but I couldn't do it any longer. This sounds stupid because I'm only 17, but I'm pretty mature for my age and I have never even met a girl that fully caught my attention (besides just physical attraction) and I am rather picky with girls (even after I have worked to be less picky I am still only attracted to a specific type).

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What Girls Said 6

  • It will pass.

    If she was never your type, then you did the both of you a favor by breaking up. Losing interest means you're losing your motivation to work on maintaining the relationship, and the #1 rule of relationships is 'When one person stops working on it, it's over.' Sounds like you were close to reaching that point.

    It would've never worked out. Just make your move towards the healing process and work through it however you have to.

  • I wonder if my ex is just like u...

    But anyway, it's normal to feel alone and time is the key thing to get over relationships. U have to believe and accept that time will your heart. I suggest u to go out and take part in as many activities as possible, so u can meet more people. Because out there, there are many girls out there that could be ur potential girlfriend.

  • Regret is different from loss. You may feel either regret because you made a wrong call, and you know she was the one for you... Or you are experiencing loss.. A pain because now you are living through the consequences of your action. It sounds to me like she was a nice girl but not the one for you romantically. You feel bad because she technically didn't do anything wrong, and you didn't mean to upset her. In future, try and pick girls who you have a real connection with.. Its a learning curve and you'll be okay x

    • Wow... you just said exactly what was wrong with the relationship. We got along and she is extremely nice and funny, but I never had the full physical or emotional attraction to her. She is very emotionally mature (she has to be to take care of her crappy family) but she was just too immature when it comes to relationships. A guy that likes serious (but also fun) girls doesn't mix well with an innocent and carefree girl. I learned the hard way that you can't force it.

  • You made your choice deal with it.

    there's no room for regret.

  • Well if she was not the type you really wanted maybe it is better for both of you that it is over cause maybe it would just have been a matter of time anyways. But sometimes a break also makes you realize the person was not that bad at all - especially if you get a chance to compare her to another girl. You might either notice you were lucky with her - or in the best case its the contrary. Its normal that you feel sad and lonely but if you broke up - even without a very good reason, I think you just don't love her enough. And its also better for her, if you are not with her. You dont do her a favor getting back to her and leaving her again.

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