I'm afraid I should have fought for her harder, should I have?

We dated for 4 months. Everything was perfect. It all came naturally, nothing was forced. Not one moment of doubt, and even if there was it felt so wrong to even think so. We went on separate summer vacations, out of nowhere, complete surprise, she breaks up with me. Claiming several things; she's too much, I don't know who she really is, she's "not that girl for me". I asked if she cheated, she said no. I believe her. After we talked for a few hours, I let her go, reached out a couple times the following week, asked to talk again, she never did. Waited another couple weeks, reached out to her cordially. And one last time last week. We may see each other here in a week. But, I'm worried, should I have fought harder for her? I loved this girl. She made My life so happy.


Most Helpful Girl

  • No idea what went trough her head o_o
    Maybe she meet someone ''better'' on her vacations?


Most Helpful Guy

  • People break up or leave relationships for many many reason that may even elude themselves.

    I wouldn't spend too much time trying to sort that stuff out because you're emotional and it's too soon to look at things objectively.

    Rather just take it at face value, she could have lead you on or continue a loveless relationship which isn't fair to anyone. I know you feel down and rejected and it hurts but! let me tell you a story:

    - A women in her early 30's just recently got divorced and had been single for 2 years. She hasn't dated much but eventually went on a date with this really great guy... they went on 4-5 dates and things were going perfectly however... she decided to end things. why?
    She realized that while there was potential with this guy, she just wasn't ready for a relationship and all of the emotions/time/effort etc... that comes with it. So she spared him his time.

    - The guy in this situation probably may find himself as dumb-founded as you feel but just know sometimes timing isn't right for whatever reason it there maybe nothing wrong you you at all that turned her away. A lot of times when people don't "feel" things are right, they make up stuff to explain their actions to help themselves cope.


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What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 1

  • I don't really understand, nobody ever break ups just like that, one day they realize they shouldn't be in this relationship? I don't think it happens like that, I think it's a steady process that takes place in a person's head and break up is a thoughtful decision and not an impulsive one. I am not sure how she decided like that, I am sure the thought of break up must have been going on inside her head for some time, surely there would have some not so good signs that you ignored or didn't realize them because you were so happy being with her that you ignored the signs.

    How was her behaviour towards you just before the breakup? or a few days before? Did she seem normal or slightly withdrawn? or more withdrawn and also weird?

    I don't think you could have fought for her harder. I am sure she would have had her own reasons for breaking up with you. Maybe she thought and realized you are too good for her, possible.


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