Girls, My girlfriend claims I abused her. I claim I'm not abusive and it was an accident. Is it her that's abusive?

Me and my girlfriend argued today. When I argue I want to let my girlfriend see my point of view while still considering hers. She's like a horse with blinders on. One track mindset.

When I saw that the argument wasn't going anywhere I tried to leave. She decided to block the door and not let me leave. I told her to move in a really angry tone. She said "NO!" And continued her rage filled banter.

I grabbed her arm and tried to move her aside unsuccessfully. So then I grabbed her feet and slid her forward until her butt layed on the floor and pulled her away from the door.

Now she's texting me at work on how abusive I am and says that I left her a bruise from when I tried to pull her from the door. Why didn't she see that my whole butt slide manuver was to get her away from the door without hurting her?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think you both need to learn how to have healthy fights. There's nothing wrong with arguing with your partner occasionally, but to do it in this manner is definitely not what it should be like. I think the question "who is abusive" is pretty irrelevant. I mean you're basically arguing who's to blame instead of realising that you need to work on things.

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    • I want to work things out. She's too ill tempered. She can't control herself sometimes and goes on a rampage. Example: seeing her drive is like watching Hell's kitchen. I need to defuse the situation. The only way I know is by leaving her sight so she cools down.

    • I don't know, it seems to be like things have to change drastically or else there's no future for you as a couple. If she is as bad as you say, she needs to seek professional help to learn to express her emotions in a healthy and somewhat constructive way. Maybe sit her down when she isn't angry and try to talk to her about this. Although from what you've written, she'll probably jump in your face.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 5

  • You're both acting like children.
    Maybe you aren't made for serious adult relationships?
    Don't answer - wasn't a question...

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    • I try to leave when I see nothing is going in or not getting resolved. At least some space defuses tension. But sometimes she thrives on it for some reason and blocks the only way to make things better because she's angry and throws a tantrum like a child.

  • That wasn't cool at all

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  • Lol that's kinda funny

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  • She sounds like a child. I thought I was reading a question by a teenager until I saw the age group. You should be careful with that. Since she is calling you abusive for something that was an accident, I could see her telling other people and exaggerating it. She sounds like a spoiled brat.

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  • I think she is.

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