Advice on opening myself up to new people after a bad breakup?

So I dated this guy for a little over 6 months and I was pretty crazy about him and I thought the feelings were mutual.
We got into a big fight after drinking too much at a party my friends threw which resulted in him "needing time" and questioning our relationship. He barely spoke to me for 4 days and finally met up with me, hours after he was supposed to. And admitted he cheated on me 6 weeks prior with a girl he dated like 8 years ago. As far as I know, he left me for her. And blew me off the night we broke up because he was out to dinner with her.
We tried to stay friends and that was a terrible idea. I attended an event he was at which resulted in another very awful fight. During the fight, he attacked me personally as well as attacking my family and friends. He made comments about my body. I'm 5'4 and about 140lbs. I lost over 60 lbs long before I met him and was never insecure about the flaws that come with that until I met him. He kind of never made me feel beautiful. He knew exactly how to hurt me with those comments and ever since, I've had so much trouble talking to anyone new in fear they will think the same things about me. I can't help but keep thinking about how beautiful the girl he left me for is and how perfect her body is compared to mine and it's really messing with my self esteem. I need some help building that back up as well as understanding how to open myself up to new people.
If it helps, we've broken all contact since.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think we get so caught up with what we see on fb or instagram that we start believing whst we see on social media to be the things we should aspire too. To get yourself back out there you dont necessarily need to be ina relationship but should enjoy life more. Go hang out with a mate, travel or do something you've always wanted to do. Once you make yourself as a person happy you'll forget about your ex and be ready to get yourself back there.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Don't do that... dont listen to him... He is a complete jerk.. Don't listen to him !! You are beautiful!!! You always were but he played with ur mind, he just wants to hurt people and he knew ur weak spot so he used it as a weapon.. A boyfriend or fiancé or husband or whatever is there to support u and make you happier and make u feel like u r the most beautiful girl ON EARTH.. He would literally always say u r stunning and if not he will help I look better... But really from what u said , that he never made u feel beautiful.. That shows how a big a**h*** he is.. Don't listen to someone that didn't love you for how u r.. I think the very first step u should do is to believe in yourself u have to KNOW that u ARE beautiful.. And please believe it coz u said it.. U never noticed those " flaws" before until he came.. that means that HE made YOU believe them , when they aren't there... Second step, DONT compare urself with that other b**** .. every person on this earth has something special and we aren't all the same ( thank God ) so don't compare urself to any other girl 😊 third step، the past is gone.. Its over and u learnt a lesson from, it, now its time for a new fresh life.. Don't make him and ur past control u.. so go out with friends and don't think about him.. whenever u think about what he told u remember that its b***s*** and that jerk isn't worth ur time.. Its ok of u don't date for a while coz u think u aren't ready but don't let people out of ur heart.. Meet some new people and don't worry, not all guys are like him.. Don't be afraid of meeting new people... Well that's it for now and I really really hope I helped u.. If u need anything u can follow me and message me and I will gladly help 😊 Be brave girl and show that jerk who u really r 😉

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 2

  • You don't need to open yourself up to anybody you should heal. You should just be more cautious of who you date and do not feel like you have to open up to guys to move on

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  • the best thing you can do is wait til you're ready to.

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