I still think about my ex and I don't know what to do?

My ex broke up with me about 6 months ago after a 4 year relationship. We were fighting a lot and I got very clingy, insecure, and jealous towards the end. I still think about her from time to time, and it hurts especially now in the summer. I feel like ill never be able to do better than her, I feel like that was as good as it gets for me, like I'll never be able to find love again. Sure me and her had some issues and maybe our goals and values weren't exactly congruent since we're in two different places in our lives, but still I miss her.

Anyone ever felt this way, what should I do?
I wake up feeling like a loser half the time for messing it all up...


Most Helpful Girl

  • Hold on in there, you're not the only one. I don't have advice to give you because I am in the same boat, my ex broke up with me 6 months ago too and probably because of the same reasons. We were together for 3 years. I still think about him every minute of the day, especially in the mornings. Sometimes I think that something is wrong with me, that I should've got over him by now because 6 months is a lot! It's not that I'm sad anymore or that I cry, I have a pretty steady life. I got myself super busy after the breakup and I still am, but it doesn't really help removing him from my thoughts. People tell me to give it time and that's what I'm doing, so we'll see...

    • Thank you for understanding.

      The only time of day I think about her is during the mornings too, and when I step outside my building during the evening. She works near my area and most of her coworkers live on my block so I sometimes see her car ( good thing I haven't seen her). This summer has been good but rough because it's the first summer I didn't spend with her in 4 years. I try to stay busy but it hurts sometimes. The thought of her with another guy, the thought of her being better off without me in her life, it makes me a little sick. I feel like I have nothing to offer and the only reason I ended up with her was due to dumb luck.

    • You should consider yourself lucky that she is not contacting you. My ex kept calling me wanting to hang out with me, giving me false hope and all that shit. I had to tell him to leave me alone, and if there's one thing harder then being dumped by the one you love, then it's telling the one you love to leave you alone...

    • Yeah, that must be pretty painful.

      My ex told me happy birthday a few weeks after the break up. Then I figured, "hmm maybe she still cares" so I messaged her a week later to reconcile and she basically told me I meant nothing to her. That birthday wish was just to clear her conscience and her way of trying to be the good guy in all of this. Then I hit her up a month later just to say hi and the conversation was just so awkward, that hurt. That convo was worst than the break up itself, I felt like I was talking to a stranger :'(

      Since that day I never messaged her again, I don't feel the need to. She doesn't want me anymore and is happier without me in her life.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Im not that great with relationship advice but I do know that you will find someone I can promise you that don't think that because of this one relationship that you'll never find a girl like her because you will and that girl will be even better for you ok? And remember everything happens for a reason❤️ Good luck my friend :)

    • I certainly hope so. Thank you for your warm response.

    • You will don't worry ❤️ and no problem

  • Apologize to her and grain her confidence back.

    • For the first month and a half I tried to reason with her and she said she wanted nothing to do with me anymore. The ball is in her court is she ever wants to work things out she would have to contact me, I'm not doing it. But maybe I deserve this, who knows?

    • Then move on.

    • Wow, Great advice. Thanks.

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