My ex and I were in love and very happy with eachother. His family didn't like me very much and made it known to him on several occasions. They knew that they were his number one priority and that their comfort was the most important to him. he started to get upset and bothered why they didn't like me because he loves me and wanted us to be together forever. He ended up gettinf a second dui and him and I were working through it. He finally told his family and they blamed it on me! they told him to dump me because I was no good and I didn't accelerate his life in any way. He was upset with the news and begged me one day to work things out with him even though his family felt that way. When I told him that it bothered me that their opinions makes him doubt us, he said he understood and two hours later, broke up with me. He refused to talk about it in fear that he would come back to me. He even refused to meet me in person to discuss. I asked him to give me a legitimate reason as to why we are breaking up when just two hours before, he was begging for us to try and work. He told me because he doesn't love me. I just don't know what to do. It's been two weeks and part of me hates him for treating me the way he did, but part of me wants answers as well. How can I get him to have an open conversation with me? I feel like his evil, manipulative family is just making things harder for us and part of me is scared that they won't let him continue to speak with me. I want to know if any of this relationship was real to him ( we would always talk about marriage and kids) was any of it real? How do I get him to see the truth about us?
Most Helpful Guy
To be honest, if it is really about family. It is no use talking now. He after all has an obligation to his family. If you really want to make things work. Ask his family, mother most likely. Father might be in favor but it is the mother who is the one you should talk.
And by the way you both are from same background ethnic or otherwise?0
Most Helpful Girl
Trying to make him communicate and cooperate when he is being stubborn and not reciprocating will do nothing but make the situation that much more intense, frustrating, and painful. For whatever reason, he's not ready to talk and he's not interested in seeing you. So I know that stings but you just have to accept that you can't control what he says or how he chooses to behave. The only thing you can control is yourself and the way you choose to behave as well as your actions. So with that said...
As hard as it is, the best move in situations like this seems to stop being present in the guy's life. Stop calling and texting him. Stop being so easily accessible. Give him time to crave the intricate parts of your existence. Your absence will create strolls down memory lane in his mind. You have got to muster the self-discipline and self-control to not reach out to him because at this point you just feel like you're being rejected over and over and over. You get him to see the truth about you two by being absent, letting time do it's thing, and allowing that truth to become deafening without you around.1
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