Is it possible for us to still mend?

Me and my boyfriend were together nine years , we had a bad break up and have been broken up four months now, it was hard to get him back to the point where he would even hold a conversation, we went out last week and everything was ok, he called the next day telling me he loved me and he wants me to learn to be humble and strong, that made me feel good but I started getting impatient again cause he didn't call a few days after that, and ruin my chances again by rushing him and questioning him, I'm sad cause he has went no contact again, do we have a chance? I have been calling him days and phone is going straight to voice mail, does he hate me, what do I need to do stop calling? Do we still have a chance? Does he just need more space? I don't know what else to do I thought four months was enough space, maybe he doesn't love me like I thought out of nine years, why do I do? So many questions? Please be honest, he says he doesn't think I have changed my nagging ways, is there another chance somewhere if I calm down?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Could this be he is having second thoughts of getting back with you? That one date you two had was a reminder of your time together in the past.

    This is why treating people you care about with the utmost respect, love and forgiveness is so important. There is no way to know how the choices you make today will affect you tomorrow.

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    • I understand, I've always been anxious and impatient cause I love him but what do I need to do just stop calling him? Will he maybe reach out again one day?

    • It is not all that unusual for people that were sweethearts in their youth to be together later in their lives. Sometimes it takes that long to get us to realize the stupid things that were so important to us when we were younger were just that. Stupid. And destructive. If there is an eternal love then it will always seek its way home.

      Don't try to force it. That is a guaranteed recipe to failure. Put your emotions aside. Listen to your heart. A true heart will never lead you wrong when guided by love. If he really loves you he will come back to you.

      Nobody said this was going to be easy. When you find that magical person in your life it is worth it. I know. I finally found mine! Hey, it only took 60 years filled with a lot of bad choices, mistakes and growing. lol

    • Your advice makes me feel better, I swear its hard seeing his car at work knowing he hasn't even put fourth the effort to call me, we work like four buildings down from each other, I'm crushed but I believe love will find its way true enough, just the timing hurts more almost feels like he is moving on with someone else by the day but I don't want to think that way it just seems that way the more we don't talk

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What Guys Said 1

  • I'm sad cause he has went no contact again, do we have a chance? I
    --- stop calling him

    I have been calling him days and phone is going straight to voice mail, does he hate me, what do I need to do stop calling?
    ---I don't know but stop calling him

    Do we still have a chance?
    ---probably

    my opinion is that you went on one date and then assumed everything was back to normal. After 9 years of dating and then a bad break up it is going to take time and more important PATIENCE. Exhibit patience, give him time to call you back. if he doesn't call then you'll know but it seems clear he still has strong feelings for you but you gotta give him some time and be patient to call back.
    Does he just need more space?
    ---probably

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    • Only thing that concerns me and makes me feel like it won't be soon is cause, he doesn't even know im calling his phone still is going to voicemal, how will he know I stop calling when his phone is off? That pushes the time further

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    • I understand I was saying I stopped calling him already but if his phone is off he wouldn't know that I stopped and that's progress for me but he wouldn't know I stopped cause his phone is off and he prob won't add min til a while

    • And everything you are saying make sense, I stopped calling even if he doesn't notice, I pray he will bump his head and come back home and realize how much I love him time is discouraging me the more time that goes by but I have hope

What Girls Said 1

  • I think there could be a chance.

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    • I sure do hope so, the four months were no contact and I finally got him to talk to me a few weeks ago and ruin it agian

    • I guess I'm hurt cause I'm wondering why he hasn't at least tried to return my calls he has two phones, the number I have goes straight to voicemail and the other phone is business, I don't have that number, but if he cared why won't he at least charge his phone up, clearly his other phone is more important and I don't have that number but I bet everyone else does that's what hurts

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