Is it worth building upon or should I just end things?

Me and my girlfriend got together around June time. I was insecure at first really because no girls have actually taken an interest in my for years, and so I couldn't understand what she did. But we started getting closer. Although I've been pretty unhappy for a while now and that's because I don't really feel like she cares about me, or that we are even in a relationship.

She's too independent and don't think she quite understands that a relationship is between two people. But she wants to live a bigger life outside of me and it makes me feel unwanted if anything. I don't have an issue with her having a life outside of me, but I just feel like I mean nothing to her, because she isn't bothered if she does see me and isn't bothered if she doesn't. And she's said that before in the past.

We got into an argument over this a few days ago. She told me it was just her personality and that I'm just going to have to get used to it. Now I've gathered that it must be her personality because her mum and dad have told me she's like it with them, and even her friends. So that I shouldn't take it personally yet I do. Any normal girl would normally love their boyfriend to bits, yet she isn't bothered if she sees me or not?

Yet I'm unhappy in this relationship and I know I'll be unhappy without her as well. We've made so many memories these past few months and it just seems like a waste. Her family love me to bits and mine love her to bits and it's such a shame if it has come to this. But things haven't been right since we argued a few days ago over it..

What do you think is best?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Break up. She obviously needs someone who's also independent, while you seek a more stable and dependent relationship. It's not fair to either of you. The time that you're spending unhappy in a relationship you're having second thoughts about could be spent being happy in a relationship where you know you belong in. Who knows, maybe one day she won't have the need to be so independent anymore, and you'll be more confident with yourself and things could work out. But that's not how it is today, and you need to do what's best for the both of you.

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    • I was contemplating ending things with her but I guess deep down I also hoped there would still be a chance, but she ended things with me last night. It wasn't a nasty breakup, but I think we both eventually realised that me and her are just two really different people who want different things. I guess it's time to move on

    • Hope things go smoothly from now :)

Most Helpful Guy

  • "Me and my girlfriend got together around June time. I was insecure at first really because no girls have actually taken an interest in my for years, and so I couldn't understand what she did. But we started getting closer. Although I've been pretty unhappy for a while now and that's because I don't really feel like she cares about me, or that we are even in a relationship."

    ^possibly i'm afraid u might still feel insecure bro...

    "She's too independent and don't think she quite understands that a relationship is between two people. But she wants to live a bigger life outside of me and it makes me feel unwanted if anything. "

    ^i see... dat's a bad sign actually... means she's not fully commited...

    "I don't have an issue with her having a life outside of me, but I just feel like I mean nothing to her, because she isn't bothered if she does see me and isn't bothered if she doesn't. And she's said that before in the past."

    ^then sounds like yer relationship's more casual actually... sorry... :/

    "We got into an argument over this a few days ago. She told me it was just her personality and that I'm just going to have to get used to it. "

    ^in other words she's da type of person who doesn't wanna commit anyway...

    "Now I've gathered that it must be her personality because her mum and dad have told me she's like it with them, and even her friends. So that I shouldn't take it personally yet I do. Any normal girl would normally love their boyfriend to bits, yet she isn't bothered if she sees me or not? "

    ^i agree... when u actually love someone u wanna see him/her 24/7... she doesn't love u as it seems...

    "Yet I'm unhappy in this relationship and I know I'll be unhappy without her as well."

    ^bro i believe u'll be even unhappier if things like dat continue... being wid her'd make u feel more unhappy in da future... so start thinkin about a break-up... :)

    "

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    • I was contemplating ending things with her but I guess deep down I also hoped there would still be a chance, but she ended things with me last night. It wasn't a nasty breakup, but I think we both eventually realised that me and her are just two really different people who want different things. I guess it's time to move on

    • i see... glad u understand.. :)

      thanks for MHO... :)

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