Was dating one guy, he was on exchange, I met another, how do you handle letting one down?

i have become friends with a guy after a party in 2013, i went to australia for half a year in February 2014 and when i came home we were meeting sometimes and making out (no sex), i was really in love with him when i was in australia, then he went on exchange in January and he was rather busy and i hardly wrote me and actually our "conversations" on facebook were all superficial, he would never tell me what he did the day or so on, i don't care if he had another girl there but i also don't care too much as we were never girlfriend and boyfriend
in the meantime i have met someone else, we were dating (no sex) and then the other guy came home but i liked the new one more as i just think he fits more to my morals (e. g. the one who was on exchange hates fat people and writes insulting comments on facebook if it is a 9gag picture or something with someone fat, and he loves guns and i hate them, he is right wing etc.)
when he was back he wrote me he thought that we would do more together when he is back home and since he is home we met once and had sushi and he stayed overnight (nothing happened) but he kissed me in the neck which i found so cute
i've chosed the other guy and it feels shitty to hurt him as he still likes me, he is a cute guy and if the other one did not come along i would probably have insisted to get to know him on deeper level
i know it is selfish to be kinda hurt as well if he probably gets hurt even more but how do you handle such things psychically? my last relationship lasted way longer than i wanted just because i did not want to make that guy unhappy but that relationship then made me unhappy


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What Guys Said 1

  • Tell him you want to date someone else, he'll get over you quickly if that's the case. And guys appreciate honesty.
    Is this about you hurting his feelings? Or more about you not feeling bad within yourself for doing this?

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    • thanks! it's about me feeling bad to hurt his feelings, like i said i was in a relationship for over a year just because i did not want to hurt this guy

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