Would you leave someone because you think they are to good for you?

Seen it happen , and had a girl say to me you can do better which wasn't lie but I loved her. so if someone accepted you completely and love ya would you leave them?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I'll put myself in that persons shoes for a minute.

    If I was someone filled with insecurity, self doubt and low self esteem then I would feel that way. If I had a guy that was my world and in my mind he is so great.
    I would feel myself inferior.
    In fact, the fact that I think so much of him may even heighten my insecurity because the more I look at myself,
    the more I will think,
    "What does he see in me?"
    "I don't deserve him."
    The problem isn't you... its her.

    Although your love for eachother is strong, you deserve to have someone that can give you the best version of themselves.
    If she stayed with you,
    with an incomplete soul your relationship will never be great.
    She has to work on herself.
    Although it may hurt, I think she's doing the right thing.

    I think you should move on with your life.
    You have no choice at this point.
    <3

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Most Helpful Guy

  • One of my exes did with me, she spent the whole time telling me how she didn't deserve me, how I was so much better, spent so much oxygen saying how I was going to leave her for a prettier girl... Thing is, I thought she was the catch and had almost no self esteem

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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 25

  • Never went through That Cat in a Hat, @Kingfrosty, but with still being to an Egyptian husband in Egypt, I have told him he needs to move on, that I deserve better than someone who is controlling and I can't seem to get on the same page with.
    As far as your sticky situation goes, she may have just told you that because she knew deep down that You had More feelings than her, and that you deserved to share these with Another Better baby.
    Good luck. xx

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  • It's happened to me. I refused to let him go. He had to let me go a couple of times before I finally gave up. He will alway have a special place in my heart, but in the end he was right. And as mad as I was and as bad as it hurt I can only thank him for sparing me the life he would have dragged me into. I miss the hell out of him, but I've moved on and am very happy.

    You can NJ to make someone love themself and until they do they can not love you :/ save your heart the pain of holding on to something that won't happen and move on. If it comes back in the future give it a go, but understand she is doing this for you.

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    • I'm in this situation right now but he doesn't have any other support in his life. I think he needs professional help and a break from me but he will hurt himself..

    • @XxMochaDelightxX :( that is what makes this situation so hard. You can not make your self responsible for his happiness. But I also know you can't walk away either. If you stick around you MUST detach your self. Do not hold out just because he is sad. Live your life to the fullest and be there for him when he needs you if you want

  • I've seen this happen too, and to be honest here I think a woman will leave a man in regards to him being too good for her because most woman will go with a guy that they think they deserve more times than not. It's a very despondent thing at times. In her mind, she probably felt that you were too good for her. Sometimes, it may be a good thing that she leaves because she may of thought that she'd hurt you and decided that it would be best for you. It means she cares about you in a way, and does not want to hurt you like I have already said. Personally, I would not leave but if I felt that a man was too good to me, I might leave. Perhaps it's because I'm scared that something this good has to be a dream.

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  • i've done this... yes.
    he did get mad at me though because he didn't think so.
    i dont regret it though because that wasn't the only reason.

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  • I would leave someone.. or let them leave, then lock the door
    if THEY thought they were too good for me.

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  • If a girl says this to you, she probably has low self esteem. I've definitely said this to guys that have attempted to have relationships with me in the past year. I basically think they don't deserve to be in a relationship with someone who has mental issues, shit self esteem, and social anxiety like I do.

    Despite this, I got one to stick by me and when I tell him that I don't know why he puts up with me or that he could do better, he just tells me he doesn't want to hear it.

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  • No because I don't have a shitty self-confidence. It's not perfect but at least I can realize that if someone wants to be with me, I shouldn't question it.

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  • If he really is too good for me, then I would probably mention it to him but I don't think I will leave him just for that.

    He could be my inspiration instead to better myself.

    :)

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  • I would never do that because even if I felt that, I'd be inspired by the person to get myself up to their level, but some may just feel too intimidated or inadequate. However, if I felt like I was downgrading then I will eventually leave after it eats me up over time.

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  • No. I want to be with a better person than I am.

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  • people in general say "you can do better " when we do not want to be with that person

    when a person is completely attracted to some one it's hard to leave then specially when the feels the same attraction

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  • I almost left my boyfriend because I thought he was better than me and deserved better, I'm glad I didn't tho

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  • Hell no! I like dating guys who are better than I deserve - why wouldn't I? But I'd leave someone who thought he could do better.

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  • Nope that's just stupid.

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  • If I loved him and he loved me I couldn't leave him no matter if he can get better girl. Besides then I would be lucky to have him :)

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  • Yes I would.

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  • Yup, gladly, he only deserves the best.

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  • So I'd latch on, say thank you God and keep it moving

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  • no of course, accept I am a really bad person or someone with a really low self esteem

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  • Yes if I thought they were going to leave me or if I thought they were too good to be true

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  • love them if they were right

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  • Lol she just said it to be nice in the breakup. She doesn't mean it

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  • She lied to you and no I wouldn't leave them

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  • No that's not a good reason to leave someone because if they felt that way then they wouldn't be with you

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  • No that makes no sense.

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What Guys Said 13

  • If someone really loves you as much they are saying it, they better show it with their actions as well.

    If someone says that you can do better, most likely they have someone else in the wings that they want to try out.

    You don't leave someone they love, you stay with them, the above reasons are pretty petty for a breakup.

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  • The only way I'd say that is if I knew I never treated her right and it's unfair for her, which I don't really do in the first place. It might seem like a really 'loving' thing to do but in the end it's just messed up logic. If you are more concerned about how much better your partner is than you, then you are in a competition; not a relationship. If you see great qualities in your partner, it shouldn't make you feel less, it'd be better if you sang their praises and be happy you're having the opportunity to spend time with them. Also, it's really just a selfish move. Often times they don't consider what their partner feels; it's just about how they know they're not good enough. Your case is a perfect example. Was the chick who left you thinking about how much you might love her and what leaving you might do to you or was she just thinking "yes I'm right and I'm doing what I think is best for him" she never even asked you how you felt. It doesn't work like that. I understand it might stem from insecurities but sometimes you have to make a choice between your insecurities and your partner.

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  • If you are thinking that you can do better than what you have then why waste that person's time, energy and emotions in investing something that you sound like you're no that much into? Just asking.

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  • That's a good question.
    I'd only leave someone if the relationship is affecting me or my partner negatively rather than stimulating growth and bonding.

    If she's a better person than I am, I wouldn't leave her. I'd treat her like my little treasure.

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  • No.

    We don't come into this world just to be complacent with the things we were brought up on.
    We live to grow in many aspects throughout life, to build ourselves to become something we've been dreaming about since we were young.

    If you've lived your entire life as a seed while everybody around you has blossomed into flowers, your life is counterproductive and you need to change your shit up!

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  • I would hope not. I'd hope that I would be happy and very appreciate to have someone like that in my life.

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  • could it be she cheated on you or loved some one else? So instead of saying the truth and guilt she just have a version that protects her reputation and leaves you with peace of mind

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  • Mistake of my past, this is not how you should think of yourself. Also there is no good and bad, there's only right bla bla (insert intelectual bullshit)

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  • Nah, just try to catch up.

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  • It can happen but I will try my best anyway.

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  • No. Never. If they think I'm good enough for them then I am and I won't question it. I leave when I feel like I wouldn't be comfortable staying in that relationship. It usually has little to do with them. Usually people who think they aren't good enough are just replaying some judgmental lie someone told them in the past.

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  • no, work on yourself and become that person you believe is worthy of their companionship.

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  • Seems like a "It's not you, it's me" scenario. She could've just said that to lessen the blow because I really don't see someone leaving just because you deserve better. If you were indeed "better" than her, then you should be her inspiration to be a better person as well. Maybe she did you a favor. If she had that kind of atitude, then it would've brought you down and it would not have been a healthy relationship. Maybe she'll realize how much she misses you and come running back to you (which you need to be extremely careful about how you handle things should she come back to you).

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