Does anyone else just shut down after a break up?

I feel like both times I've had a boyfriend and had a break up, I just stop caring. I'm sad and crying for a few days. Then it just stops. I don't feel anything. I am happy and content with life but its like men are just white noise to me. I don't want to talk to anyone new for years, and no one really seems to interest me. I don't know if I am just to independent to care to kindle something new or I'm just weird xD does anyone else get this way or what.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Totally normal, when you're single you're free!!! you go and do anything you want, taking time off from dating to refresh the mind sometimes is the best thing to do. it shows that you're happy with yourself and don't need another human in your life to be happy.
    some people after a breakup date whatever falls from the sky just to get a rebound

    I would go cycling, I work work out I would go skydiving, rocky mountain climbing and do two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu

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    • I liked the way you think.

    • The only person I need is myself :) hell if it were up to me I probs would have never had a boyfriend. I don't know, I may be 21 but I never have seen the need to date around. I feel like with my missions i have set I have no time for silly feelings.

      At the same time though, I hate that I have felt so numb my entire life that I don't care if I find someone. I get told I'm to beautiful to waste my time alone... But I don't know.

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What Guys Said 5

  • I don't think its all that unusual, you went through something painful and you are reacting to that pain. If you are content and happy then you don't need to worry about it.

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  • I am the same way. Not weird I don't think

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  • Yes, this is normal to shut down after a break up nothing you can do
    just try meeting new friends your young , you have plenty of time to meet
    up with someone new..

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  • Yeah i did 9 months later im just getting a bit more like my old self. Pathetic really

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    • I mean mine has only been a month luckily... But then again the guy broke up with me four times. I feel like this last time was just it for me... I love him more then life itself but there comes a time to let things go. If someone made me feel the way I did the last year... I deff need to let it go. I almost died because of the stress on my heart. I'm 21 I shouldn't be having heart attacks because heartache.

      I really hope all is well for you tho darling :) keep you're chin up. Your worthy enough to have that special someone in your life. Don't dwell over those who were never meant to stay. Just remember this, you can be at peace knowing what ever misses you was never meant for you.

    • Thanks for kind words. I miss her soooo much 😭

    • No problem :) I may be a young one but I'm actually pretty wise for my age! If you ever just need someone to blab to without the worry of being judged I am deff you're girl, just message me! I made it one of my missions in life to help those around me.

  • yep
    When you realize that it couldn't have worked out anyway, and that it's in the past, you're just like 'Hm alright, you're right, Brain'
    There's a reason why you broke up too

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What Girls Said 6

  • Yes, that's happened to me before. I think at that stage, I've become numb. I like to isolate myself and do my own thing after a break up. I think I try to heal myself during those stages.

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  • I'm going through a break up right now and it has been difficult. A part of me has shut down but another part of me is still positive about finding someone new again and falling in love again. I'm just keeping my options open right now and have a chilled outlook on things. I'm not going to rush into anything but I'm not going to completely detach myself from dating either. It's been a few weeks and I still get sad though. I can't just not care or forget about what happened and what lost.

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  • I've completely shut down just like you. I am still in love with my ex boyfriend and honestly I'm so depressed and miss him so much that I can't imagine ever moving on. I don't want what I had with him with anyone else. It's the worst feeling in the world.

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    • I was like that for a month. Now I feel nothing. I do not cry. I do not get sad. Nothing. I love him, yes. I wish him nothing the best, but I can not dwell on what is broken. Nor should you darling! If you ever need someone to vent to, I am here. I have been through some pretty shitty things in my life, and they have helped me become very strong at a young age. I love to help others become strong as well in even their darkest times :)

    • Thank you :)

  • I do... I think it's the deep down inside we know we can survive without a man. Just that they are annoying and you need one for companionship

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  • It really depends on the break up however I let myself grieve the relationship and I know it will soon end, the frustration and the feelings. I never suppress my feelings anymore because I know it will come back to bite me in the ass x

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  • i always do.

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