Which breakup was your hardest?

Was it your first love, second love, or third?

Which was your BEST love? Which one did you have more feeling for?

Do you compare current lovers to past lovers? What makes other ones better or worse?

Bonus: Did you lose your virginity in your first serious relationship or in a later one?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • My 2nd, since I was engaged to him. My first love wasn't really love I guess, more infatuation. I really liked the guy, but we were both so young. I was young still when I met my fiance, I was 17 and we got engaged when I was 18 (he was 20). We were together for a while, but broke it off.

    No, I don't compare past guys to the guy I want to date or am dating. Or try not to. Sometimes if certain things start feeling the exact same, it gets a bit eerie. But I try to think that everyone is different and hope the relationship will work out.

    A worse one is obviously one that mistreats me; abuse (physical or mental), cheating, lying... the big deal breakers.

    Yeah, I lost my virginity to my ex fiance.

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    • Finally someone not hung up on their first love.

    • I was 14 with the first "love", and we were together for about a year. But so young... I didn't know what I really wanted and neither did he. He's a good guy, though. We've been friends since then. But I don't have any romantic feelings for him at all.

      Thank you for the MHO!

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What Girls Said 15

  • ten years ago, i fell in love with someone who ultimately hurt me. he was my first love and, combined with lingering abandonment issues (my parents split when i was little), things went south quickly.

    when i found out that he'd slept with my roommate, my mental state went from bad to worse. i quit school, drank a lot, and thought about suicide constantly. i cried for months. and, when i finally came out of it, i was determined to never let anyone close enough to hurt me again.

    after that, i shut down and became icy. i had (unhappy, meaningless) relationships that i ultimately left because i was unhappy. i thought that i'd had my one chance at love, that i'd fucked it up and would never have it again.

    for a long time, i was the frigid bitch, the ice queen~ and, in 2013, my then-roommate showed me frozen; i was immediately taken with it, because i saw myself in elsa's character~ conceal, don't feel. and that was the wake-up call i needed. i realized that, if i was ever going to love again, i had to stop closing myself off and be receptive to it instead of shutting down.

    with this in mind, i ended a relationship that wasn't working and, on the advice of a friend, signed up for online dating. i created that profile with very low expectations, but my older and wiser self did find her better half.

    in the words of olaf the snowman: "some people are worth melting for".

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  • Me and my first love broke up a few weeks ago. I thought I had previous loves but after this last relationship I realized my last ex was my first true love and that other guys were just flings or lust fantasies. It has definitely been the most difficult break up yet and I did lose my virginity to him as well which only deepend my feelings. I'm not sure if I'll compare others to him but a part of me will always have a special place for him no matter what but I do feel like I'll find love again and be even happier with someone else in the future.

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    • I am assuming what made this relationship great was it was an actual relationship. Not to say your future relationships cannot be as passionate or stronger, I don't know yet. You'll have to see.

    • you should no that all boys are same. and being in relationship they all want to do is intimate , and as this is finish they break up. i was in relationship but i never allowed him to intimate with me..
      relationship is not all about sex, its about how much can he love yo without touching you.
      love is not touching your body its touching your heart and soul..

    • @Asker

      Yeah I'm sure there will be other passionate relationships. I don't believe I can only have love with one person.

      @sosa2506

      In most adult relationships people have sex. That's normal and we didn't break up because of the sex, we broke up for other reasons. It's wise to put off sexual things till you are in a serious relationship and ready for it which is what I did too. When you get older you'll maybe understand how sex and relationships work but at your age it's best to keep off sex cause the guys likely aren't ready for anything serious yet.

  • My first love, because I knew it wasn't working and I was tired of all the pain and cheating he's caused me, but still I didn't want to leave him. My second Love was good at first, but then I kept questioning myself. I haven't had my greatest love yet, both relationships turned me into a shitty person and I've learnt from both of them. I didn't lose my virginity in either of those.

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    • Were you not over your first love before you dove into a second relationship? Like was there very little time between your first and second relationship?

    • There was very little time, but before the first one officially ended, mentally it ended way before

  • My ex boyfriend was my first boyfriend. I don't even care if I ever fall in love again, or never... he will always be the one that I'll love with every part of my heart and soul... he will always be the most amazing person, with the sweetest personality, and the most caring eyes in the world. There will never be anyone to fill his place in my heart.

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    • But I am assuming you are like these other women and haven't opened your heart to other guys. Probably haven't been in a serious relationship just as long as your first.

  • I just broke up yesterday with the love of my life. It hurts a lot to be honest. 'Cause he's the first guy who had a serious and mutual love relationship with me.

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  • I fell hard for my high school sweetheart. We were neighbors and together all the time. He was my first love and worst heartbreak. In order for him to follow his dreams he had to leave me behind. I still love him and wish him the best. He deserves better than anything here has to offer. Three years later and I haven't even attempted another relationship since. I guess I'm still hoping he'll show up all heroic and carry me way.😢

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    • Maybe he will.. Your a beautiful girl. You shouldn't put your whole life on hold because a boy broke your heart.

    • "Three years later I have not attempted another relationship since"

      -So you have not let anyone else into your heart? Do you think you could be putting this guy in a pedistool and keeping yourself from meeting guys that can show you love just as great if not better?

      Two, you say
      "He was my first love and worse heartbreak"

      - How can you say that if you have not loved anyone since.

      Here is my concern. He obviously has more important priorities right now. Who knows he could be having the time of his life in another relationship while you wonder if he returns to you.

    • I never said I was smart... I don't want to put myself out there to risk that kind of pain. I was physically and mentally broken. It's not worth the risk to me. I sincerely hope he is having the time of his life. He always wanted to join special forces and he did it. I hope it's everything he dreamed it would be.

  • My hardest break up was with my second boyfriend, and yes he was my first- fun times (!) It was horrible, absolutely devastating- especially when I cared so much and he'd moved on. but I think the worst part of a breakup is when you think this person you're devoted to truly cares and it turns out they know nothing about you.

    Oh well, in the long run i think a break up can teach you more about yourself than a relationship :)

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  • Hardest breakup: the one where I tried to dump, took back, found out I was being cheated on, and then dumped.

    Best love/most feeling: the one where I knew him for exactly who he was and still liked him and really got along.

    What makes one better: for me, it was the depth and strength of the connection.

    Virginity: lost it to someone I didn't necessarily wanted to give it to. Someone who wasn't important to me.

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  • second guy I slept with was my most felt hard break

    first heart break was 6 grade

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    • So your second serious relationship?

    • no , first boyfriend was after my second heartbreak

    • Finally a girl who does not think her first boyfriend was the best thing ever

  • The first one and since then I have been avoiding relationships.

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  • Never loved, never had a breakup.

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  • haven't lost my virginity yet but it was recently the guy i loved but was scared to show it was falling apart and i tried to tell him to get his self together mentally , fincancially , and to build self esteem before a relationship w me because dating me could cause more stress to him he replied rudely like " _ years old and i got the rest of my life to think about my future and what i want to do w my life "that was basically saying to me "fuck u i got the rest of my life to do this" then yesterday he went to my friend about to cry because i blocked him. But i refuse to wait for someone i have lupus i dont know when it might flare up and i end up in the hospital and he takes life as a joke.

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  • I think it would be the one who a person care for you the most and he is the one waiting for for and looking after you. Without a doubt that is the love people had once and let go. And now that he is away, I regret not appreciating him enough when he was around, and it hurts his absence for months now.

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  • I never had a hard breakup

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    • Have you had a serious relationship?

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    • Usually, not always. Let's go with long term relationship for this example

    • No I have not

  • My most hardest break up was in my 1st serious relationship. I lost my virginity to him at 15 and I had to break up with him at 17 because of his activities when he wasn't around me (selling drugs/hustling) only because it put me in danger. I was madly in love with him, and it broke my heart to break up with him after 2 years of going strong.

    Nobody understood why I loved him, because all they saw was the tough drug dealer exterior. They didn't know what he was like on the inside. I sometimes compare him to others, because I can't help it.

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    • Have you been with anyone since just as long as him?

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    • The thing is you may not be over him yet.

    • I think I am over him, I don't think I'm over the amazing sex.
      Me and him are friends to this day but none of our friends would ever let us be alone because they know we'd get ideas to do things..

What Guys Said 9

  • My first love. Mostly because neither of us wanted to breakup, but didn't know what else to do.

    My current relationship is hands down better than all my past relationships. I think we all rate our relationships, even if we don't take time to verbalize it.

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  • First. When you're young you don't realize that the "stay friends" thing is a horrible idea. That you learn from experience.

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    • Funny, the girl I am talking to is "friends" with her ex

  • Defiantly my first love, that one, that one hit me like a bag of bricks.

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  • First was the hardest.

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    • Have you had more than one girlfriend tho?

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    • OK, have you been with any of them as long as you have been with your first. Like before you went to the subsequent relationships, did you give yourself time to get over your first one?

      And why would you say your first was the hardest?

    • I jumped too quickly into my second relationship. It didn't last long. Third lasted about the same amount of time as the first. Fourth has been the longest.

      It was the hardest for a number of reasons. First it was my first relationship and I threw all of myself into it which made it that much harder. She also cheated on me. Since then I've guarded myself more, which is unfortunate

  • The one where I broke my nose, that definitely hurt

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  • Breaking up with my exfiancee.

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  • My first then my most recent because she told me she wasn't like that... and boom cheated

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  • Having no Nokia 105

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  • I think my first serious breakup was the hardest... the girl that currently broke up with me.. I loved her the most... but it's almost like I'm over her in a weird way, not really sure why or how... I guess it's because I'm confident that she will be in my life one way or another? I either see her being a close friend or back together one day... either way.. right now I don't care what happens with us.

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    • Have you had any relationships since? We're they just as long?

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