Guys, Why is he still nice to me after the breakup?

Some time in May, an online friend and I had a falling out. It was pretty bad, I was at fault. I can't really go into detail as to what happened. I want to protect our privacy. Because of an issue of mine and something I said to him, I think I triggered something and now he's extremely uncomfortable interacting with me. I broke his heart too, unintentionally. I can't go into detail about the nature of our friendship, but we met by chance and instantly bonded over secrets. Those secrets were the basis of our friendship. He was away for two months, so we had no contact with each other besides him trying to contact me because he needed emotional support for something unrelated to me. Unfortunately, I couldn't be reached. When he returns home after two months he sends me an email. This is where things get interesting.

In his email (and subsequent emails thereafter) he was nice to me! Overall his email was pleasant. He didn't treat me as someone who hurt him, although I did. He didn't curse me out or cut me out of his life instantly. He even apologized for trying to get in contact with me for emotional support because he felt it was unfair of him to do so given our situation. Because of the way we spoke to each other before he left, I half expected us to have another knock down, drag out fight. That didn't happen. We agreed to separate for an undetermined amount of time until we got our feelings sorted out.

I sort mine out before he did and gave him an update, I also sent him a heartfelt letter I'd been hanging on to. He responded in kindness to my emails and apologized for not giving me details or answers because he's too uncomfortable to do so right now. He even told me he was glad I was making progress working on my personal issue!

Guys, I really hurt him and he doesn't trust me, but why is he still so nice to me? I know how angry he can get with me, but this time he wasn't. Why? Why would you be nice to a girl who unintentionally hurt you and/or broke your heart?


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What Guys Said 1

  • Because you realized it was unintentional and you feel bad for the fight

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