Do you people feel I should try and contact her?

I am a guy who is shy and awkward around women in my real life due to which i never even had female friends. But recently i met a girl online who is around 3-4 years younger than me and lives in another city and we became good friends. She has had several relationships but is currently single. She even has many online guy friends too but has stopped chatting with them and only chats with me online (as told by her). Its been around 4 months we have been chatting.
She has even sent me many pics (decent ones). I talk to her like a good friend and am quite open unlike females in my real life with whom am shy n awkward.
She has had break up with her seious boyfriend days before we met online.
I am not looking for a girlfriend or any sort of relatioship... but i get a feeling that she has some sort of feelings for me which i totally donot want to happen. She even wants more of my time to chat.
Hence on a very small matter i have stopped chatting since few days. Now I don't know wether i have done right thing or something wrong. Have i hurt some girls emotions unknowingly?
Should i try and contact her online?
I donot want some girl to be sad and hurt due to me.
She is at a stage of her life where she is willing to marry and settle down in near furutre... and i donot see her as my potential girlfriend or any sort of relationship...
is it my fault that i started chatting with this emotional vulnerable hurt girl?
How to make things very clear to her?
I have jokingly said that she is my younger sister... to which she was very angry and said that she has NO intention of being my sister... ever...


Most Helpful Girl

  • You both have started this nice 'Friendship' Online here, dear. And with things you may have Implid that of course Lead her to believe there may be more in store, she is going to be very vulnerable right now and wear her heart on her sleeve.
    I find this rude and crude that you are now M. I. A and this is no way to Begin your own Beguine of something special that could lead to a Potential partnership down the love line. How do you think couples get together and why online? Many are looking for love in a few other places than a bar or a nearby street hangout.
    Go back and save the day with this amazing girl who has feelings for you. You have cold duck feet, and if you want to have a nice friends for now, be a straight arrow and tell her in a round a bout way that she is a nice person, has a heart of gold and you are glad that you both are friends right now.
    If she is smart, she will either talk more of this or just be silent as her golden goose egg tells her you want to nurse and nurture a friendship first.
    Good luck. xx

    • thanks for your advice... but what is M. I. A ?
      but am still not getting your point here? Do you think online friendships are waste of time? and what should i do.. seriously... try n contact her.. or just ignore this forget this online chatting as a small phase and move on

    • Show All
    • I donot want to do anything with her... never... if i openly say this to her... then will she be mad at me that why the hell did i start chatting to a girl online and why did i play with her emotions? although i have never played her emotions.. never said anyhting of that sort to her..

    • Well, remember, she is in this vulnerable state now with are a bound of any Robert due to her other situation. Yes, probably be upset but behind this computer wall and all, just move on and let it be a lesson here, dear.

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What Girls Said 6

  • I think you should just enjoy your friendship.
    Do not distance yourself. That will hurt her.
    If she shows indication that she wants more or says it, tell her she's a great girl but you're not at the time or place in your life where you want to get seriously involved.

    Rejection hurts.
    But trust me, she won't be hurt for ever she will move on.

    • She already has been hurt and ditched by a guy just very recently... hence i fear she is very vulnerable and emotional as well.

    • I know. But you can't let that weight be on ur shoulders. Just no matter what be there for her. Trust me she will appreciate that

  • You are hurting someone what more by ignoring them than simply telling the truth. You absolutely owe her a explanation and should try to contact her if you have any respect for her feelings. Tell her the truth so she knows what is going on and can focus on finding someone better suited for her. Keeping her in the dark is a very nasty thing to do to someone. Just fess up and say how you feel even if it's hard for you.

  • just tell her that you consider her as a friend. but if you just disappear, you'll hurt her feelings. I think it's better if you just say what's on your mind to her, be honest than just running away without explanation and it's better if you can still be friends with her.

    • if i try and contact and message her now... will she still reply and be open to talk to me? Will she be rude intially?

    • well depends on what kind of girl she is, but I really think you should give it a try...

    • i donot want to invite any sort of trouble or heart aches to her or myself... and am not good at handling women and their tantrums... since am novice in terms of dealing with women and their emotions.

  • just be honest.

  • Stop torturing the poor girl and just leave her alone. Don't ever contact her again.

  • If you know she has feelings for you and you don't, just do not contact her.


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