She's afraid and uncertain?

Me and a very close friend have ended up admitting having feelings for each other, and we've also "gotten physical". However, she's SO torn between "being positive" about it (saying she likes me, wants to be near me, that she gets "that feeling" in her stomach when we kiss etc), and being scared of either hurting me or being hurt herself, should we take it further towards a relationship.

Her view on love/relationships seems to be that no relationship lasts forever, and therefor it's only painful to even try - "because it always ends up in heartbreak". Yet she cannot give me a straight "no" to the situation, she's obviously having feelings and thoughts that somehow counteract her usual need to escape instantly. She also says that in a relationship she's afraid of realizing she likes the other person more than he likes her, or realizing that she's loved more by the guy than she loves him back - in both cases she claims she'd break away.

I want to try. I'm willing to give her all the time, space and support necessary for her to clear up her mind a little. The best thing I'm hoping for now is for her to dare giving us a try - It'd mean a lot to me and I think it'd be... a waste, to let our feelings just die. Though, I'm having a hard time telling her how much effort I'd put into making her feel appreciated, as I'm afraid of falling into "he likes me too much" category and scare her off.

I want her to realize how much she means to me - and, not that I think that highly of myself - prove that there's guys out there who'd really put their heart and soul into her. I would.


Also, when I tell her I'm afraid she'll lose interest because she might take me for granted because I tell her deep/emotional things about her/us, she says that's not the case - and that it only increases her respect for me and the situation. What should I do?


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  • Well, she's not able to trust men


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