Why would you tell your ex you liked them if you didn't want to be with them?

Why would you bring up to your ex that you still have feelings if you don't want to get back together? it seems really pointless and confusing especially if you know that person won't settle for anything less than a relationship


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Depends on the context.
    I've broken up with girls I still had feelings for because it wasn't going to work and when we talked a month later she asked if I still had feelings for her. I told her the truth and said yes. But I also wasn't going to get back with her

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    • I didn't ask him, we hadn't spoken in months but i heard from mutual friends he'd been telling them he wanted to get back together with me but i didn't react to it but then he messaged me directly saying he still had strong feelings and wanted to get back together but didn't want to because he's not sure it would work, i don't get the reason behind this?

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    • Yeah very much so, i really like him. But the advice i've been getting is he just wants to use me for sex. I told him i still have feelings so he knows i feel the same, i told him i couldn't hang out as friends with benefits or anything like that cos that would be too hard and could i have a bit of space for now. I'm just not sure if he had genuine feelings or wanted to have sex.

    • Sounds to me like you handled things appropriately. Taking time away for yourself is best and can also help you gauge whether or not he is serious. Because you were honest with him and said, not now/no friends with benefits situation. How he acts from here will be your best bet on figuring out where his head is at.

Most Helpful Girl

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What Guys Said 2

  • Because they want to lead you on, keeping you on the back burner while they explore other options, knowing that you're waiting there if they get bored.
    Never tolerate this kind of behaviour. Let them know that you want a relationship, and if they're not into that, then they can call you if they change their mind.
    Being able to walk away and mean it is the best negotiating position.

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  • You could still have feelings for your ex even if things didn't work out

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    • if you still had feelings for your ex what would convince you to give a relationship another try?

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    • The problem is now though that after he told me he didn't want a relationship i put too much pressure on because i didn't understand why he brought it up if it wasn't what he wanted immediately and asked for space because i didn't want to get into a friends with benefits type situation so now we aren't talking and i don't know how to start talking to him again without coming across needy or a push over or creating drama he's too stressed to be a part of. Do you have any suggestions? i don't want to scare him off but i also want to make it clear he doesn't get to use me for sex without a relationship commitment

    • I respect what you are saying. I think he need to just let you know when he is ready, because you have a lot of respect for yourself. You are ready for a relationship, but he's not. If he is not ready to be with you then, he can't have you for sex since y'all are not in a relationship. If he's man enough to have you sexually, he should be man enough to work things out with you by coming up with a solution to the problem and not running away.

What Girls Said 1

  • Because he wants to fornicate :-)

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