Have you ever looked back and realized you did too much for an ex who didn't deserve it?

I just want to know what you all think!

Looking back, I did so much for my ex. I loved her more than she could ever love me and I gave her everything. This is embarrassing, but a couple years ago I made her a "secret box" with the pull string and everything just like on spongebob 😂. It was monogrammed and it had a heartfelt poem in the secret compartment. I wish I could take it back (being the dumpee and I was basically cheated on).

But seriously, you may think that your ex deserved everything you gave him or her in the past, but what do you think now?


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  • Yeah, there are a few ex's who I have bent over backwards then over and backwards constantly to prove my love for them and guess what, they took advantage of me because I was being too convient for them.

    Its just my personality to love so hard but it doesn't discourage me. when one door closes close , another one opens. I believe karma has its way of dealing with people, even those who hurt me and abuse me , I hold no grudges but I know that it will catch up to them; I just hope it will show them mercy.

    So think of it as a manner to strengthen your core as a person =]

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What Girls Said 15

  • Yep still recovering from a totally broken heart. I gave my 1st boyfriend as much love as I could and he didn't even make the slightest but if effort to take care of me. He never went out of his way to do anything special for me, he was always too lazy/too tired. I was always told how much he loved me and wanted to spend his life w/me, but I stopped feeling like he cared that much after about 5 or 6 months. Although very painful for me I walked away from him. I still have feelings for him and care about him a lot, but as each day goes by I am healing. I am spending time on myself, improving myself and I know one day I will find the one man who will always love me and will be willing to do anything for me (as I am willing to do for him).

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    • Aw thank you for your comment. I'm so sorry to hear that. I'll pray for you to find that perfect guy for you. I know you truly deserve a perfect guy in your life.
      I gave all of my love to my ex as well. I know it hurts, but trust me when I say that everything will be okay :)

    • Thanks for comment, I cannot wait for the day when I will feel ok. Yeah I was the one who broke up w/him, this was one of the hardest things I've ever done. I just wish I could have just lost feelings for him, that would be so much easier.

    • I know how it goes. I know it's a hard thing to do. It's been 8 months since my ex broke up with me and I'm just now starting to be okay... However I don't think I'll be over her for another couple years. at least you have learned what to look for in your next relationship so it can be even better than this one. Things can only get better from here :)

  • I haven't but they may felt that way about me. That's why I try to keep it 50/50 with out offending him as a man cause in the end we don't know what or where or if we'll even be together so why spend money. But if I really like the guy and know what he likes I'll get random things for him just cause but I never regretted it

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  • Yeah with most of my ex's

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  • Yes. He was a whiny douche. I cooked him breakfast & gave him massages.

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  • Yes, with one ex. I'll prob always regret it.

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  • Honey, i am realizing that now and it hurts on so many levels. One, because you invested in the relationship that was one sided. Two, because you worked your ass off for someone who didn't care, and three because you look back and maybe feel like it was a waste of time and effort and who knows what you missed out on. I have had to realize that some people are truly beneath you, as bad as that sounds, but courtesy and class seem to be extinct with some people.

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  • yes many times

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  • I do. everyday. I was way too invested in the relationship, and he was there just enjoying that, without much effort at all. It hurts.

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  • My ex didn't deserve my forgiveness. Only becuase it was thrown back in my facew again. I found out about him sexting another woman. Forgave him, only to find out he was doing it again. So he didn't deserve my forgiveness or understanding.

    Otherwise everything else yeah why not, he is someone who made some shit choices. Doesn't mean he didn't deserve the other stuff.

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  • If only I could go back in time...
    It's been 6 years since I fell for him and I still can't get over him even after he cheated on me...

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  • I regretted breaking up with my ex for a really long time. He forgot about it and moved on quick. I tried getting back together but he had a girlfriend. I've moved on and now I feel that I shouldn't miss him. He wasn't all that great. Many other people around me think he was an asshole. I now know he wasn't the one for me. I'm happy I've found someone better now, he seems so perfect.. I don't know if he likes me like more than friends tho. It's worth a try.

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  • LoL F*ck No :) I know my worth & will never put more in a relationship than the other person. They better match what I'm bringing or its over, with no hard feelings.

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  • Oh yeah. In hindsight I was too accommodating; I went above and beyond to make sure he was happy without letting him know how I felt. I let him move in with me, I paid for everything, I cooked dinner most nights, I let him have my car while I was at school or work (since he didn't have a job)... he didn't do anything for me.

    That was my first serious relationship. I will hopefully learn from that, and try to reach a balance if I ever get in a relationship again. I don't want to have resentment towards my guy, that will make me loathe him eventually and break up with him.

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    • You'd be a fantastic girlfriend. I'm glad there's people out there like you. You deserve someone who could treat you as well, if not better than how you treat them. Thank you for your comment!

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    • Thank you very much Miss Anonymous! :) Enjoy your night (or day depending on where you're from)!

    • Sure thing! Thank you, it is now night time here on the coast. Enjoy your night as well! :)

  • I did a lot for my ex especially when we first met, I was there for him emotionally and financially sometimes, he was an idiot sometimes he really made me doubt a lot of things and wonder if he deserved it. Well eventually we broke up so... I guess no. I wasted time and energy on that guy.

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  • That is the cutest damn thing I've ever heard. I'm a big spongebob fan so I would've loved it ;D

    There's no point in reminiscing on all these memories because then you'll feel like an huge idiot.

    I gave him a lot of stuff he didn't deserve and it. makes me nauseous sometimes to even remember

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What Guys Said 10

  • I know I did way more financially for my X wife than I ever should have , I justify what I did by knowing her kids didn't go without

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  • yes, i gave too much till the point the relationship was 90/10
    she dumped anyways.
    I learned to never make a woman feel too special because she will step on you.
    I also learned that immature chicks are the worse because one day they love you and one day they dont, one day the love you and are willing to fight for the relationship, the other day they think its not going to work so they cut you loose.

    NEVER MAKE A WOMAN FEEL TOO SPECIAL, SHE WILL STEP ON YOU.

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  • Been there, done that. I hold no grudge.

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  • no I look back and realize wow they did so much for me and I didn't deserve it.

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  • Fortunately, no.

    Did this ex of yours show any signs at all of not being as into you as you were into her?

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    • Oh of course she loved me, it's just that I don't think she was capable of loving me as much as I loved her. I'd always be like "let's do this, let's go on a picnic, let's go to the zoo" etc. I'd always make traveling plans and took her everywhere. It seems like the only way she could maximize her love to me was to get physical (not sex). I guess it's hard to love someone equally back when they'd go to the moon and back just for you.

  • I dont think, I know she doesn't deserve my love.

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  • Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.

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  • I sure have a few times.

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  • I think I can't think so narcissistically because if I was that much better than them. I wouldn't have dated them in the first place.

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    • But what if your SO changed over time during the relationship? Like cheating or just trying to find theirself. It's nothing you did, they just changed? You wouldn't have known that from the start of the relationship

  • Yes, I stayed with my ex much longer than I should have. She treated me terribly, but I felt so much love for her. Eventually, her bad attitude took its toll and I had to end things. I don't regret ending the relationship, and we haven't seen each other or spoken since then, but sometimes I miss what we had in the early days.

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