I [24/f] opened my boyfriends [29, m]phone while he was sleep and looked through his phone. In our 6 months of dating, he has never made me feel like I couldn't trust him but I wanted to know anyways. I found what I didn't want to see, nude pictures of his ex girlfriend. They were all straight up nudes that look like she took just for him. It kinda bothered me that she has more of a figure than me. I'm Asian, and I don't have much of butt. The fact that her butt is huge kind of makes me insecure. I want to strangle him in his sleep, but I also don't want to tell him because then he would know I looked through his phone. I don't want to hurt our trust level in the relationship. What do I do? Do I demand him to delete them? Do I break up with him
Most Helpful Guy
Well, you should remember that this whole thing is actually your fault. It'd be different if his ex was currently sending him nudes and he kept them. They're just old photos on his phone. It's a moral gray area that he still has them, because you don't know if he's using them as "fuel" for anything or if he just has them.
But you breached his privacy. You broke his trust. Regardless of what you found on his phone you had no right to go through his phone to begin with. And those bad feelings you have towards him is completely unjustified. You don't have to like it, but you have no right to be mad at him. You should be mad at yourself however. You did this to yourself and facilitated these negative emotions and if you guys get into a fight, breakup or if you even just act passive aggressive towards him. That's on you for breaking his trust from the start.
So yea, I don't know what you should do. But of I were you I wouldn't open with, "iI entered through your phone because I can't trust you" . Because even if you say you trust him, going through his phone proved that you obviously couldn't. If you did you wouldn't have done it.4
Most Helpful Girl
LOL at wanting to strangle him in his sleep. Sorry but that cracked me up.
Anyway, you say that he hasn't done anything to make you not trust him, so you made a mistake at choosing to look through his phone. I could understand if you had good reason to do this, but you didn't. Still, you should tell him but do it tactfully. Tell him what's done is done and that it bothers you deeply that you found this. You gotta bring it up even though he may get angry -if you don't it's just gonna gnaw at you.
Give him a chance to explain what's going on, and decide what to do based on his explanation.2