When you ask someone 'how are you doing', do you want them to tell you the truth (even if unpleasant)?

When you ask someone 'how are you doing', do you want them to tell you the truth (even if unpleasant)?

Title says it all.

K. Thanks.

- Harvey D


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yeah, I actually want them to tell me the truth. If it was an unpleasant answer, I really don't expect them to open up and explain me their situation with that simple question of "how are you doing?" It would be strange if I asked a person "how are you doing" as I'm passing by, and they say, "well, I drank, and took cocaine while I was pregnant, I took part of a hit and run, and now I'm getting a divorce."

    I mean, I would like them to tell me the truth depending on the person( like a close friend, or family member), but like I said, I doubt the truth will just come out with that simple question.

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What Girls Said 8

  • It depends on who

    I mean, I don't want the lady at the bus stop to spill her guts to me but if it's a friend, then yes, I want to know what's going on in their life and if there's anything I could do to help

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  • I'd always rather hear the truth, because if something is wrong I'd like to help them the best I can.

    I just don't like it when I know something is wrong and they say they are fine I don't like to pester them about it, but I just want to help and be there for them.

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  • How are you doing is really more of a phrase of greeting. No one actually wants to know, at least not in passing and not if it is a stranger. I would think the indicator would be, has the person stopped what they are doing and turned all of their focus onto you? If this is the case, then likely they ACTUALLY want to know how you are.

    I'd say I mean it when I ask people how they are doing. Once I asked when I was working at a grocery store and the woman blew up at me and started ranting about the things that were going on in her life. To tell you the truth, I honestly felt bad for her. I hope that her saying how she really felt was more therapeutic than harmful and that she didn't regret it later. I couldn't help, but who knows, maybe just telling some one was enough for her, you know?

    I'd say I ask expecting anything. People will do what makes them most comfortable. That is what I am most comfortable with. So yes, I am interested, but I wouldn't give the third degree.

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  • I want them to tell me the truth but in a pleasant mannor.For example if they are having a bad day to say 'Ah,its not so good' instead of 'Well,*lists numrous problems*'.I've actually had my someone list every single problem they had when I asked 'how are you?'.So I would want them to tell me the truth,but to have the courtesy not to whine while doing so.

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  • It depends, if it's my friends than yes I actually want to know how they're doing. If it's someone I'm not that close but I'm still friendly with then no, I don't particularly want to hear all the details of their life, if I did I would've gone out of my to find them so I could hear about their life. So depending on the person I either want to know or I'm just asking to be polite

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  • Yes I would. I don't like people to hide things from especially friends and people I am close to.

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  • for Friends, I want the truth.

    others, no.

    same if people ask me the same question.

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  • Not all the time. If its someone I feel comfortable talking to then yes. But most of the time I don't always like telling the truth because then most people tend to ask what's wrong, and I don't always feel like spreading my business. Its not that I'm hiding things, I don't share my business with everyone.

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What Guys Said 4

  • ROFL you'd be surprised how many people actually tell you how they are doing. I once said how you're during to a girl in the lunch line and she started crying and saying how her boyfriend is hitting her and she feels like she can't stop him. She went on and on how he was raping her and cumming in her even though she wasn't on the pill and how scared she was that she was pregnant. I mean wow... I did not expect something like that. At the end of the day that guy got arrested(after I decked his ass for getting in my face for "being around my girl").

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  • Well yeah man, I mean the truth ain't always a good thing but your straight up honest. You don't want a nice lie, compare to the bad truth, because there is no such thing as a good lie, take care man.

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  • I'd rather hear the truth from them, then for them to avoid telling me something that isn't true.

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  • Yes, the truth and not ok or fine while it's not ok or fine.

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    • My mom said that "fine" is just an acronym for Fucked-up Insecure Neurotic and Emotional. :)

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