Can't stand the thought of him w/anyone else?

A month after I broke off my 1st relationship, some days I am crawling out of my skin missing him, since the break I've been going pretty much NC (just wanted my stuff back). I got pulled into a one sided relationship, where I was giving and he was taking w/out reciprocating. This started w/stopping the sweet texts in the morning (the night texts also wained completely, I did always respond to those messages) to taking forever to text back, being less eager to see me, making less effort for me, willing to go w/out me to his regular bar once a week (something he rarely did in the beginning, we usually spent time together). Breaking off the relationship hurt so much for me and it hurts deeply that I am not the girl he will always love. I put in so much love only to get a lazy response from him. In one of our arguments I told him that I was crazy about him and he is one of the best things that has happened to me, he was not pleased and just asked me why because he is just another guy. I am so afraid that I will never love anyone again so deeply and almost feel like there was something wrong w/me that he doesn't love me that way.


Most Helpful Guy

  • You know, I felt that I wouldn't love again with all of my exes. Or that I wouldn't love as deeply. Hell, I'm going through a break up right now too. It hurts, a lot, I know it does. Feel it, let it hurt, be emotional, and when you're done, get up dust yourself off and keep on marching. It's easier said than done, I know, but you'll be okay. I know that doesn't sound glamorous either. You don't want to be okay, you want to be with him. But remember, you were the one putting the effort into the relationship, not him. For you to break up with him shows that you are already beginning to recover because you recognized that there was a problem. It wasn't fair to you. Keep doing NC. Just get your things back, do it through friends if you can, because seeing him will just hurt and you'll keep throwing yourself back into a hole. If you guys haven't actually sat down and talked, then I would suggest doing so. I'm not talking about arguing, I'm talking about closure. It sounds like you need some, and without it you're losing your damn mind.

    Surround yourself with people, go out and do things! I feel like this suggestion is never taken seriously, but it works! Do what I do and record yourself talking about how you feel. It helps to know why you are feeling how you do and to have a reference point. It'll keep you from looking foolish later on. It isn't your fault. You were just doing what you know best. You were doing you, and he couldn't accept that. You will love again. I know this was your first relationship, but look at it this way. You've been loved before, and you've loved before, which means it's possible to do it again. Every love is a first love because it's your first time being in love with that person. You're doing fine :) just keep your head above the water and don't forget to breathe!

    • I actually sat down and talked to him about how I felt right before we broke up, his reaction was what tipped the scales to me having doubts to me knowing the relationship would end miserably.

    • Then it sounds like you've done all that you can. He's being unreasonable. You unlike most people, realized when enough was enough. This is not an easy road to walk, I'm sure you know this, but it's one we all walk at some point in our lives, sometimes multiple times. Take all the time you need and when you're ready, put yourself out there. Like someone once told me, "just like a conveyor belt, there will always be another one coming down the line."

Most Helpful Girl

  • Hi dear i read your comment and i know how you feel now because i have passed through this same way with my boyfriend and i was so depressed but am happy now we are back together today there are some advice i would have to give you to take and it will surely work out for you i want you to email me on my private email so we can talk better and tell you what to do. this is my email address mccartkatty@gmail. com


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What Guys Said 1

  • Half the planet is guys. Most relationships aren't successful. If they were we'd all still be with the first we ever dated


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