Girls, Ok so will No Contact work for me? Woman's opinions strongly needed?

Gonna make this as short as possible. Met my now ex girlfriend in February. We dated a little hear and there and got serious in August, moved in together in October and she is gone. Her reason for the break up was that I was smothering her and suffocating. Looking in it now she is right I was. I hadn't been in a relationship in 6 years and that closeness and affection was euphoric and like a crack addict or something I did go overboard with the affection and not having a life without her or wanting her to have one without me. The day she left I was a babbling fool about a text that was totally innocent and she said she was gonna leave for a few days and I got even worse and she said fine packed her stuff and was gone and done. I am NOT usually like that and didn't know I was suffocating her until she was gone and her best friend told me she said that was the reason. By using NC obviously to help me get over it, do the women here believe it will bring her back showing her I am not that needy, clingy and smothering person. Obviously if I truly was I would be begging her right now (this is day 3). She has contacted me several times but for things that she left in the house and Mail and stuff like that. I just read the text and don't reply and took everything of hers to her mothers.
Forgot to add that she told me many times she can't believe how good I treat her and that she doesn't know what she would do without me. Said that many times prior to break up of course and said to boyfriend ever treated her with so much respect and dignity.


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What Girls Said 1

  • 1. You seem to have possessive traits, so try to work on feeling secure in yourself, and try less to rely heavily on your relationships with other people to feel fulfilled.
    2. If you don't want her to "have a life without you" you might want to think about how that isn't a good thing to feel or think about someone you truly care for, you should want them to be happy with or without you.
    3. If she felt smothered, it's good for you to have a conversation where you acknowledge where you felt your behaviour could improve, but try to keep the contact minimal, and positive when she does contact you, and let her approach you.
    Take this as an opportunity to find how to be happy on your own, because you don't want to develop attachment issues, and end up jumping from one relationship to the other just to have someone.

    • I'm good on my own always have been. Just got too clingy which is not in my genetic makeup. Don't know why I did it. Haven't talked to her or any communication for 4 days but she has texted me or called me for some reason every day. I don't answer or respond. She has also stalked out a girl who also liked me when we got together. The girl made a comment on my FB about my ex and I not together and she sent her a nasty message and then blocked her. Then she asked me today if she could still have her sons bday party at my office (we have a clubhouse) I didn't respond so she went through my FB again and found my assistant and messaged her. My assistant told her no cuz she already gave to someone else. Told her she assumed since we broke up she wouldn't be using MY office for her party. So she lit into my assistant and was nasty to her, then texted me and called me names.
      It is like she is trying to get a reaction out of me to affirm her choice to break. I REFUSE!

    • Oh, she's incredibly immature and expressing her pain by doing that, but it's good that you aren't responding. Don't condone that behavior, or involve yourself if she seems to be mean to others and yourself.

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