How long should you wait to move a girlfriend in if you have a kid?

So, I have been split up from my daughters father for about 6 months. In that time he had dated two women, both of which he brought around our daughter. I am not comfortable with women being so fleeting in her life. Needless to say, the newest girlfriend of 2 1/2 months is being planned on moving into his house which our daughter is half the week. I have never met this woman and have no idea anything about her. I told him I am not comfortable with someone who is a stranger to me living with our daughter; it's not fair to her. He lied to me about it and moved her in behind my back. I don't know what do to. He is not a bad father, but he makes horrible decisions that affect our daughter...


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  • I'm sorry but the statement "he is not a bad father, but he makes horrible decisions that affect our daughter." Is like saying "no I'm not sick, I just have been having flu like symptoms all week." Kind of doesn't add up.
    I really think you should try and work things out so you are able to at least meet this woman. You will never be able to completely control who he dates, but I think you should at least know them on some level. Maybe when you drop your daughter off at her dads house you can hang out for a little bit so you can meet his new girlfriend. Don't hold a grudge when you meet her, and don't make it about you, because in the end; its not about you. Let her talk about herself, and allow your daughter to talk about her experiences with his new girlfriend (assuming that your daughter is of talking age.)

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  • Moving anyone in after only 2 1/2 months, child or not, is a horrible idea!! It's a huge commitment and they don't know each other well enough yet. He's showing your daughter these impulsive decisions are ok. And that's not ok.

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