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One question I have to ask: has he ever been deployed? You said he was in the military. Has he ever seen combat or been overseas on active-duty (Iraq, Afghanistan, etc.)?
I'm not saying that his behaviors are necessarily excusable. But is there a possibility that there might be something else going on with him (i. e. PTSD), and maybe he needs some support instead of cut-off?
Just a thought...0THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE