How to break up with someone gently?

I just feel like I don't love him as much as he loves me. I don't love him at all but he thinks I'm his world. I know there is a girl out their that will love him and cherish him for all he is... I just am not that girl.

I've decided to end things. What is the least hardest way to end it with someone. He is really sensitive when it comes to this stuff. I don't want to say the wrong thing and wreck or break him to pieces. I would offer to be friends but understand if he doesn't want to be one.

He says I'm his world and he loves me so much I'm the only good thing in his world right now. The only one that believes in him and encourages him. I just don't know how to end it but Im not happy in this relationship. He puts me on too high of a pedastal. If I end it he'll be crushed but I know I just can't be with him guys I really don't know what to do.

I tried making it work it just doesn't.

I don't want this to be the thing that breaks the camels back.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • There is no way to do it gently. Once he realizes he can't love you and you love him back it's going to hurt. Nothing that can be said will soften the blow enough to make him okay with it.

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    • I know... I just wish I could love him back but I don't. He's a nice guy I don't want to hurt him.

    • Show All
    • I told him today everything and he said one more chance and could we start over. Then he pulled out a ring. He said it was a promise ring but it looked expensive like an engagement ring. I just held in tears and declined...

    • message me or post a reply on one of my questions (of your choice.)

Most Helpful Girl

  • As Hard as it may be and as Sad it Will be, not only for Him but for you here, dear, it has to be Done because you cannot go on, Sugar coating the Inevitable, which I feel, deep down, he probably may have gotten a small hint already by even an action that showed Him... I don't love him at all.
    You have been hi sEverything, his life support and the Best thing that probably Has ever happened to him. But there were probably moments when a hint of a hymn and a haw and all, was a tiny writing on his wall and he may have seen it but you Continued to etch it in stone without being Cold about it.
    Sit him down and do this After the upcoming holiday, may I say, and tell him what you feel. Tell him you care about him and always will but Honestly, You are Not ready to be in a relationship right now and friendship is the way you are hoping it can be.
    Of course you can only Imagine how he will feel or what he may do, maybe walk away and be angry at you, but it is something that has to be done, no use in pretending, because in the long run, That too would be just Cheating you both out of something in life that may be better for both of you down the road.
    This will surely hurt you as much as him, and you will feel sad and bad, but if he really has all this love and admiration for you, he will either see it your way Or... The highway.
    Good luck. xx

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What Guys Said 2

  • If you don't mind me asking, I'm curious what it is that makes you want to break up with him? He sounds really into you and really good to you, but why aren't you into him? I just find that interesting, there must be something you're not saying?

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    • Maybe it's because we rushed and I never really got to know him. Maybe it just isn't the right time.
      I just don't think it's fair to be with someone who's head over heels for you but your just starting to like them or only care for them. Its not right to them or you.

      He believes I'm the one. Talks about marriage and kids. I just that commitment right now too much.

    • Okay, I understand now. He's just much farther along in the relationship than you are and in some ways that seems scary and uncomfortable to you? You're still trying to get to know him and he's talking marriage and kids with you. In this case, I'd agree with you, he is pushing you away by being too serious too quickly. Before breaking up with him though, would it be worth it to just talk to him and tell him it makes you feel uncomfortable? Tell him you two are obviously at different stages of the relationship and you'd like to make it work but he needs to come back down to your level? I'm not in your mind, I don't know if you really have no interest in him anymore. But you did mention you might be just starting to like him so I'd think before abruptly ending it, try talking about your issues and let him know for you guys to continue he needs to take a step back. If he really cares for you, like it seems, he will understand and go at your pace to save his relationship with you. Win Win.

  • Yeah unfortunately for both of you he is going to be totally heartbroken. All you can say is that you don't see a future with him and you are not as into the relationship as he is

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What Girls Said 1

  • Just tell him how you feel. You're not happy in the relationship. You deserve to be happy. point blank.

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