**LONG DISTANCE BREAK UP** Is it my fault?

Me and this guy had been dating for about 3 and a half months, and it was a long distance relationship. We texted everyday, some days more than others, and we saw eachother every few weeks or so. A few days ago, we were talking about our crazy lives and how busy we were, and then he asked me if it was even worth it, if it would be better to just be friends. I was dumbfounded. I didn't even know what to say. I told him I understood, and if he just couldn't do the whole long distance thing then okay... So we ended up breaking up and just being friends. He said "I still love you...", but at that point I was mad and on the verge of tears. We are still friends, we still talk and stuff but I feel like now it's just awkward. But I still love him so much and he still loves me, and I feel like if I would've reacted differently maybe I would still have him... Please help I really don't know what to do anymore but I miss him so much...


Most Helpful Girl

  • LDR is One of the Hardest to Have and to Uphold of Any relationship, @hope0930 and I, for one, know this probably Better than Anyone from the Best of the Rest. I still have a husband out in Egypt and well, long story as always, I have told this a million times over.
    In your own case, he has told you that being Friends was better for him because the Other end, my friend, was Not worth his time, although he still has you on his mind. He doesn't want the Commitment nor being hooked at the hip in this Internet relationship or Other means of communication and this is Why... He told you no lie.
    It's your call, your choice in what you feel is best for you. If you both find you cannot Find the time to try and get together, become Team partners in making this effort, then His "I love yous" are something that he may still Feel, but will keep at bay like a loose Wheel.
    Sure, it Is 'Awkward' and the More you Talk, the More uncomfy it will Feel because you want the Big Deal and he doesn't.
    Don't feel 'Dumbfounded.' This happens a lot. People always ask me Why I chose to marry a man in Egypt whom I never ended up living with nor wanted to stay married to in the end.
    Good luck. xx


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  • Long-distance isn't for everyone. It can be hard to make it work if both people aren't 100% invested in it and it sounds like he wasn't. I don't think it's necessarily your fault, he just realized that he feels too busy to maintain the relationship due to the distance. If that's how he feels then there isn't anything you can do to change it. I'm sorry, just take this for what it is and try to move on.

  • Its hard... trust me... its hell of hard esp... when the person thinks its not going to work... Sometimes I wish like say yeah I'll move and become homless and start looking for work for you!! but... eh guys don't seem intersted at all! So, its rare! i know a few people who are in LDR and have made it work and are together... Paris13 is one of the few i know... i think she married.

    • @Paris13 your married right?

    • Show All
    • @Paris13 awe thats awful... aw if you ever need to lean on! I'll try to push u up!

    • @apple24 thank you so much, sweetie.. and you know, I am here for you as well. xxoo

  • You need to have a serious conversation with him about your future together. If you guys choose to make it work once again, you definitely need to see him more. How far away do you live from him? Meet up every second week or so. FaceTime or Skype regularly. Text him every chance you get. Long distance relationships are difficult but definitely doable. Don't loose hope that you guys can make it work. But, if you guys choose to stay friends, continue texting him. Don't stop just because you feel like there's no hope. There's a possibility that you two might end up together in the future, & not be miles apart. Remember there's many guys as well as girls who can change the way things are. Speak to him about all these things & don't loose any hope whatsoever!

    • we both live in New Hampshire, but we live about 30min away from eachother. IK that's not very far, but considering neither of us can drive... and do you think it's too late to talk to him about it?

    • Are your parents kinda strict on the whole dating thing? If not, then that shouldn't be a problem. They drive you to places where you can meet him or possibly even his house. You can also go out with friends & ask him to meet you there & spend time with him. & it's definitely not too late to speak to him. If you guys still love each other then you should do it now, rather then later because it will be 10x more awkward.

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