From extremes? I don't know what I've done now?

My boyfriend tells me how much he loves me
wants to spend the rest of his life with me
I'm his soulmate the one

his ex's tried splitting us up, didn't mind him being friends with them.
Got fed up of the ex's verbally attacking me despite me not reacting or responding to them.
So my boyfriend he kicks off with me as I wanted to talk things through to clear the air. I'd had enough so wrongly gave him the ultimatum me or the ex's I want them blocked being friends with them isn't working and it's ruining our relationship.
He blocked them he refused to talk about ehe he reacted like he did towards me and why was he so reluctant to let them go and why he didn't stand by me when I was being verbally attacked He decided to throw a huge hissy fit and broke up with me.
few days later we
Decided to make amends have a fresh start
only get chance to see him weekends was supposed to meet him Friday
I was busy at work and had to keep my replies short he thought I was being awkward so he decided not to meet up.
I was annoyed as I cancelled plans so we could meet up and have a good chat and start over. I rang him he refused to let me speak and shouted at me telling me I wouldn't listen then he suddenly told me it was over he's blocked me and refuses to see or speak to me?
He told me he wasn't coping and he had been struggling for along time he really opens upto me so I offered him advice and he said he loved me he wanted to buy a house with me next year and settle down? he did all the chasing he faced timed me every morning afternoon and evening he would text me in between. He has a bad week at work and now everything is all my fault? His past is all my fault?
What happend? What do I do? I love him so much if this is depression talking then fine I'll handle it I'll be waiting for him when he's feeling able to, but if this is genuine and he really doesn't want to be with me then thats ok I'll have to move on but I deserve and adult conversation without him having his say and shouting at me so I can't get a word in edge ways, not once have I raised my voice to him.


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What Girls Said 1

  • Giving men ultimatums never works. It's not about the subject your focusing on, it's entirely about you trying to control their actions, and they HATE it. They will resent you, regardless of whatever reason you gave them for asking they don't speak to someone. They feel very strongly that it isn't your place (not even as their partner) to dictate their behaviour, or the choices they make. You may believe you had good intentions, and it was the "right" thing for them to do, but they don't think the same way as women, and all you have done is threaten to take something from him (your relationship), and try to manipulate his behaviour, which is exactly what an ultimatum is, regardless of good intentions.

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    • He asked me months ago if I'd like him to delete and block them I said no I wouldn't want to come between friends but it's all the verbal attacks had to stop. They didn't and I'd reached the end of my tether as he wasn't standing by me and protecting me despite me not saying anything to them I just tried to talk to him about it but he stopped me immediate didn't want to hear my opinions kicked off and humiliated me everyone in public I have never raised my voice to him I hate to row I merely asked him a question and wanted a simple conversation like the adults we are. He came back to me telling me was depressed and not coping I offered him support and told him it was ok and gave him advice he then proceeded to tell me he was sorry and wanted to be with me move in together settle down next day it's suddenly over because he camcelled on my last min and I had cancelled my plans just so I could be with him

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    • Thank you xx

    • Happy to help :)

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