My partner of four years is moving overseas alone. What should I do?

My partner of four years who i live with told me last week he is severely depressed, hates his job and misses his family and friends in the UK ( we met and live in Sydney, Australia). He is originally from the UK and has been in Aus for 7 years.

He says he wants to find himself and start a business there and make the money he has always wanted. i offered to take 6 months leave from my job to move with him. At first he agreed and we started planning the move. Now he has changed his mind again and said that while he will always love me, he is no longer ‘in love’ with me.

He says his depression and loneliness have changed who he is. And I’ve changed too. I used to be easy going and ‘chilled’ – he booked a one way ticket at this time last year though and said he had to leave alone when his dad was unwell. We got back together after a day and I went to the UK for Christmas with him. Ever since we returned though I’ve always been scared he would try and run away again. I never trusted him fully. Checked his phone sometimes to try and protect my heart and often pressured him about marriage or completing a defacto Australian visa ( which I even lent him $5k for).

He says he used to be so in love and once wanted a future and family with me. But not anymore. He doesn’t know if he wants that with anyone now.

So long story short, his flight home is in two weeks. He finishes at work in two weeks.

we are still living in the same apartment but sleeping in separate rooms. Part of me wants him to stay at home as I hope there’s something I can think of to say or do that will change his mind and make him regret his decision and see what he’s missing. The other part of me though is in pain and unable to move on when he is in the next room ( I just want to crawl into bed with him and hug him).

What should I do?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Sounds like he doesn't want you to go with him.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • No the relationship is done time to move on. To be able to say he doesn't love you anymore is huge! Time to let him and yourself move on.

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What Guys Said 1

  • crawl into bed with him and hug him

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