Why did all my relationships end in fighting?

I am very careful with who I date and I only date people I think I'll last with. But always it always ends badly. I honestly don't know why. I don't do anything wrong. It just always falls apart and there's always a lot of fighting it and with every girl I've been with the fighting has been over completely different stuff. Nothing in common at all. And I really hate fighting and try everything to avoid it but with every girl I've been with that's all it is... People (even my exes friends) say I don't do anything wrong and that we just weren't meant to be or that my exes were bad people. But I don't know why this keeps happening. I am just so confused and hurt by this. I am not going to date anyone else until I fond out what's wrong with me... Any help would be appreciated


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Can you share some of the things they argue over? Maybe I could help.

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    • With one it was her always talking about other guys or checking out guys or flirting with guys. That kinda stuff. With another it was just little pointless stuff like what to do or where to go. Just small stuff. The third it was always about us. What we wanted from each other what we expected that kinda thing. I always tried to stop the fighting because I a hate fighting with girls especially ones I care about.

    • Okay so it sounds like they are either not interested or they are just pushy. Those things aren't usually something you should argue about. Expectations are something you look for before a relationship not during. And maybe these girls aren't worth it. Find you a girl who will pay attention to you and not check out other guys, find one that will not have any expectations during the relationship.. One that will love you for you and what you come with. We all have that special someone who will be worth our time. Go out there and find one.. These just mean you're one girl closer.. Oh and there's nothing wrong with you!

Most Helpful Guy

  • Read your comment to @inlovewithaboy

    The answer is simple, but one you don't want to hear: they don't respect you as a man.

    Women want a man to be a leader. That doesn't mean she wants him to be controlling. A leader, in the most noble sense of the word. When a man achieves that, women melt.

    But being a leader sometimes **seems** contradictory. Because it means you have to be assertive. Sometimes you have to say "no" to what she wants and stick to your guns, even if she throws a tantrum and starts arguing (DON'T back down from a fight). Your decision making won't always be popular.

    But women want and desire a man who won't let her get away with throwing tantrums. Someone who demands the best from her at all times. She wants a man. Not a limp noodle. Not a pushover. Someone who does what he wants without apology... but who also takes care of her emotional well being, her needs, and desires.

    You aren't satisfying that role. Clear as day to me, based upon your comment.

    When women are dissatisfied, they rarely outright tell you what's wrong. They'll hint. They'll imply. And if you keep "not getting it," they'll eventually argue, throw a tantrum, lose attraction for you, and seek out a stronger man.

    Your lack of leadership makes them feel restless. Unnerved. Maybe (often, actually) she won't be able to articulate what's wrong... so she'll argue about petty shit. That's your opportunity to reassure her that you're a strong man -- by shutting down her Bullshit. She WANTS you to win the argument so that she's sure she isn't dating a weak chump.

    Anyway, you get the point.

    Long and short of it: grow a fucking spine, have a sense of direction, be decisive, and stand your ground.

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    • Yeah. I agree with you. But I tried that in the beginning of the relationships but the fighting kept happing and I just got tired of standing my ground when no matter what there was going to be something new in a few days or weeks...

    • I get what you're trying to say. But...

      Leadership isn't something you try. It's a state of being. It's pervasive. And when your leadership is being questioned, it's because there are holes in the bucket. You've got to repair them.

      That means it's self-improvement time (everyone has room for it). Bottom line, become a better man, have more success with women.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Did you tell them lies?

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    • No. Never lied to any of them

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    • No :(

    • Did you used get over jealous when you used see your girlfriend s talking to other guys by any chance?

What Guys Said 2

  • When relationships end, people get hurt and lash out. Most importantly, you see a side to them you've never seen. It can be very shocking.

    What worries me most is your statement of "I haven't done anything wrong." I'm sorry, but that sounds to me like total narcissistic bullshit. My bet is that when they're yelling at you, they're actually trying to tell you what you've done wrong and it's just to difficult to believe because it's not how you see yourself.

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  • What you waiting for join martial arts and mma

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