My ex said he missed me, but doesn't want to be in a relationship?

So, my ex and I dated from freshman to junior year, he was not only my boyfriend, but my best friend. We broke up about a month ago over a really stupid reason. But during that month of us being single, I said some really mean things, he would ignore me, I would cry, and just "normal" post breakup things. So two weeks after the break up, we talked in person and I was crying and he was just telling me how he felt happier being single, didn't really want to get back together, and things like that. So we didn't talk for two weeks after that. I texted him because of a family issue, and he responded and wasn't being rude. Then, three days later, he texted asking if we wanted to have lunch as friends. I said sure, and we started texting again. Then, he told me he didn't want to have lunch anymore. The next day, he texted me if we could have lunch and I said sure. Later that day, we saw each other, he came up to me and gave me a hug then told me that he missed me. He then said and texted me he was sorry for saying that and hopes that he didn't lead me on. I got kinda upset, but didn't show it. So at lunch, he said if we got back together it would have to take time, and that of course he missed me and things like that (this all got me super happy because I honestly thought he hated me and wanted nothing to do with me) we then had "lunch" (we made out lol) and afterwards, he told me that he doesn't know for sure if he wants to be in a relationship, then texted me saying we probably shouldn't talk. I talked to him the next day about it because I ignored him after he texted me that, but he really said he just doesn't want to be in a relationship because he wants to "find himself" we haven't talked since then. (Which was yesterday) Why is he acting like he wanted me, then just completely turns me down and changes his opinion. Like after the lunch he said he hopes that he didn't lead me on, even though he was the one who texted me first, hugged me, and then we kissed. Does he really not want to get back together, or is he just in a post breakup "phase"?


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  • My be he doesn't want to break up again. When I broke up with my boyfriend I felt really bad. I wanted him to still be my friend though I just didn't want to break his heart again. Becuase in a way his pain kinda made me feel worse than he probably did. He cried too. He gave me time and I still want to be a friend. But now I am considering him being my boyfriend again. Maybe if you could stay his friend he might consider being your boyfriend again.

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    • You're probably right! Like I talked to my guy friend about it and he said the exact same thing, my only problem is like whether like that's cue for me to actually start moving on and maybe try looking at other guys, or just to not move on and wait for my ex to change his mind lol. Cause I still really care for my ex, I just don't want to wait for something that won't happen.

    • Maybe if you start talking to other guys, that could speed up his idea of dating you. He knows you r single now and you can talk to any guy you want. I suggest talking to other guys to make him jealous. He can't show that he is mad that u r talking to other guys cause u r single. And maybe the more you talk to other guys the more he will consider being in a relationship with you.

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