Just found out that my ex is engaged. Why does it still hurt so bad?

It's been over a year. We dated for 5 years since I was 18 and he was my first everything. I was in love with him to the point where it made me a fool. It started to fizzle up and I knew it was coming to an end but I didn't wanna see it that way. He got engaged to my ex friend (a former mutual friend) who used to smile in my face but was sleeping with him for the past year. Kept it a secret. He told me one day that he never loved me and that he always loved her. He's known her for a year longer and each word that came from his mouth last summer hurt like a knife. As a matter of fact, he even went as far as to tell me that he was only with me because his family liked me so much. We planned a wedding, future children, traveled to three different countries but what did she have that I didn't? Was I not good enough? Why did he lie? I'm still hurt even though it's been a year and I'm dating a great amazing guy. The new guy is such a great person, he's older and much more wiser than my ex. He wouldn't like to see me hurt like this over an ex and I feel like he truly loves me, but for some strange reason I still feel hurt.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Having been with him for five years, It will in fact, take a very long time to get over him... ESPECIALLY if he was your first. It may even take 5 years to get over him. It sucks and he treated you horribly, but it is normal what you are feeling.

    Do your best to cut him from your life and head into another direction that doesn't involve him.

    • Thanks. No, he's not in my life anymore. He'll occasionally reach out just to brag. I tried to remain cordial.

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • You spent 5 years together and you were a part of each other's lives for so long, it's not like you can just forget that and what you shared so easily. And you loved him. So yeah, learning that someone you used to have so much with has officially moved on and is starting a new chapter in his life with someone other than you is going to hurt, it's normal.

    • Thanks. My family thinks I'm being ridiculous for having a feeling about it.

    • They shouldn't, this isn't weird or a bad thing to feel at all.

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