I am moving, and I dont think it will last. How should I end it?

I meet this girl on Tinder, she is from another country, (we've been "together" 8months.)
we went on a few dates and then when the time came, I asked her to be my girlfriend
She went back to her country for a short while to visit family then came back to contiue her studies.

Also, to see her, I have to drive 1.5hr+ to see her. So the relationship is already kind of long distance.

Now, I got a really good job in another state. I will be moving in January 2016
but just based on our history, I don't think her and I will last dispite both of us liking each other.
it just because of the kind of people we are.

If I wasn't moving or we lived closer to each other, this would be a differeret story.

I just have been worried. We've never really had enough time. and we don't have an end goal to be in the same place, becasue she dosn't know what her goals are (plus visa things). and that worries me. she told me once "we may have to wait 5 maybe 10 years but we could fly once a month to each other" and I am thinking "when will we both be in the same place? not 1hr away or a plane flight away. but 15 min away or maybe even come home and see you." and I can't just buy a plane flight every month espically with starting a new carrer.

I just know that this will end in heart break for both of us. But how do you end something with someone you love and care about?

PS: i know one of you guys will say "marry her" but I still dont feel like I know her enough and she has showed me somethings about herself that I do not like...


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  • "just based on our history, I don't think her and I will last dispite both of us liking each other.
    it just because of the kind of people we are."

    The fact that you said this tells me that you've already checked out and made up your mind on this.

    • What things has she said that you don't like?

    • she has a very short fuse, and gets frustrated easily. and I am very calm and patient. She got upset with me because i asked her about her goals and future plan. She keeps saying "Its in Gods hands/control, so why should i plan 'cause is will change."

      then she has a bunch of "guy friends" and she considered ending it with me because she was getting so much attention from those "friends" , i know she needs affection and that is something i won't be able to give her if i am 12hr away in another state...

  • I did long distance for nearly 4 years and got my heart broken, so my perspective is a bit jaded.

    It's very hard to make future plans with someone when your own future is so volatile. When you do long distance, you miss the little things, which really add up after a while. And it's harder to see when people change. With that being said, I know a handful of people who have and still are doing long distance succesfully.

    I know that I appreciate honesty in a man, and I think you should share your fears with her. She probably feels the same way. Long distance is not something to take lightly and really requires a lot of sacrifice, but can be very rewarding for some people.


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