Have you ever given someone a safer excuse to break up with them because you knew they couldn't handle the truth?

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Also, that they'd promise to change and try to draw the failed relationship out further when you are completely uninterested?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • All the time. People don't want the truth. They want whatever doesn't leave them feeling worthless and depressed. I'm not going to tell her she fucks like a corpse getting electric shocks or her pussys so wide I can hear an echo when I'm licking her out.

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    • Did you check for jumper cables? Lol. No, I know what you mean. The last thing you want to tell her is that it's like she's been smuggling bowling balls vaginally. How about: "I wish you'd wash that more often."

    • Lol defo a recipe for getting a frying pan smashed off your face. That's the risk when your a bloke so I'll stick to bullshit. How about when she does the splits furniture goes missing lol. Cheers for the top billing by the way

Most Helpful Girl

  • I was dating a guy for a brief amount of time. I knew after the first date that I wasn't attracted to him, but I continued to date him to really give it a chance & see if I would be proven wrong. I wasn't. He was SO nice, and treated me SO well, so I felt terrible for not feeling the same way, no matter how much I tried to be attracted to him. But, it just wasn't going to work out, so I had to come up with an excuse to end it. Because he was so nice; he treated me like a true gentleman should treat a woman, and because I could tell he really liked me, I felt it just wasn't right to break it off with him by telling him the truth that I was just not interested in him the same way he was interested in me, and that I would never be able to reciprocate his feelings.

    So, I told him that a longtime friend of mine confessed his feelings for me, and that the feelings were mutual. I told him that I'd like to see where it would go with this friend. That part was the lie. However, I said (and genuinely meant it) that in no way was this his fault and that there's nothing for him to feel bad about or defeated about. It was all on me. I apologized to him, and told him I wish him all the best.

    Even until the very end, he was so gracious about it and wished me well. I would've loved to remain friends with him, but I had to lie to him, and I wouldn't be able to tow him along knowing he had feelings for me.

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    • That was very kind of you, actually♡

    • Thank you for saying that! When I did it, I felt like the most terrible person ever, especially because he was the consummate gentleman.

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What Guys Said 5

  • Since my divorce I am up front and honest about everything. If they can't handle that, then we don't need to be together. if there is an issue with the relationship that might make me break it off, I talk through it with her. I did that in the last 2 relationships I had.
    I was with someone in January. 3 times in 4 weeks I basically tried to break it off. we just were not sexually compatible. she wanted sex to be 99% intercourse. I want it to be mostly oral. I am willing to compromise, she wasn't.
    also, I wanted to know all about her and she didn't want to talk about ex's at all. well I was with mine 25 years, I can't tell you about me without telling you about her a bit.
    The 8 month relationship I just ended, there were a number of things. But she broke up with me around month 3. we talked for a week about all the issues I had. Then about 6 weeks before I ended it, we talked about all the issues. everyone was the same. not 1 thing was different. That is why I ultimately ended it instead of waiting until next year. it was clear she had no desire to change. and I was done playing a distant 2nd to a husband that was dead more then 3 years.

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    • You have a lot more patience for perseveration than I do, especially if someone is going to have a real difference about sex. I'm a widow so I understand talking about a lost partner. I hope you find the right one soon!

  • Great question. No, but I was prepared to. I was in one relationship where I wasn't physically attracted to the girl. I was coming up with things like how our different interests were incompatible.

    Fortunately, I never had to. She broke up with me.

    I'm curious, asker, if you have ever given a "safe" reason and what was the outcome?

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    • I have learned to fib and say that I'm leaving him for someone else because that's less of an ego blow than I'd rather die old and alone than be with them. There's less incident of drunk dialing or him trying to see me after to talk about it or be friends or something equally asinine.

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    • Brilliant.

  • I'm a kind person at heart.

    I can't help but sugar coat the truth 10 times over.

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    • I'm kind and sensitive but I'm pragmatic more than anything. My main interest is a clean break up with minimal hassle. That way we can both move on and meet someone more suitable or be alone and find our own truth.

  • I didn't broke-up with but she did... but she gave me the reason

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  • Nope, i never cheated.

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What Girls Said 3

  • nah never. i tell it like it is.

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  • No I never had to do that before!

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    • Good, because it's quite a moral dilemma!

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    • I guess. I do it bc I have to make myself feel better.

    • We've all done it.

  • Yes. It was not just to be nice and save them from the truth, though. That's part of it, but it's also hard to tell the truth knowing that in doing so -exposing the real reasons why- you're also revealing things about yourself that aren't that flattering.

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    • I think we've all been there♡

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    • Yes, agreed. That's why I think it's best to be very honest with yourself, but be careful who you trust some of those truths with, if you choose to tell them at all.

    • We think alike♡

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