Most Helpful Guy
Sorry for what a happened, but simply you still giving him the priority to be his backup plan. if you're afraid to lose him as he already lost you before, you'll lose yourself respect. life gets much easier when you deal with the source of your pain by cutting him out form your life.
but if you wait until something happen to take your next step, you’ll likely be waiting the rest of your life. make your happiness more important than him and move on, cuz the only person who can make things right is you.
Good luck...2THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE