My ex his hanging out with her previous ex (guy she dated before me) today and I'm feeling terrible. how can I overcome jealousy?



my long distance ex girlfriend and I have been broken up for 5 months now but we dated for a year and two months (longest any of of us two have ever dated). My friend also dated her but it was before I even knew either one of them and only for 5 months. Now me and my friend both live near the same city and she decided to come up because we have other mutual friends who were planning a get together in the city. I wasn't able to go because I was coming home from college that day and couldnt make it. Me my friend and my ex were suppose to hang out along with other mutual friends. Then she decided to stay another day. He told me that they were just going to hang out alone for that day. Im guessing they did but when he texted me that they decided to hang out alone and she didn't want to invite anyone else, It just hurt really bad. I know Im sort of being a child because I broke up with her in the first place but I still felt very jelous as if she picked over me. (mind you she's been texting me on and off throughout that past few months with mostly her intiating, and she also hasn't removed pics of us from instagram, almost as if she hasn't lost feelings for me). All this time I thought I was over her when I truly still think I am because Its not like I was thinking about her all the time. Its just now that i'm feeling this way. Can anyone explain why? How can I overcome this?
Im feeling unwanted, discluded, overlooked. How can I fight this


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  • You don't need to "fight" anything because you are talking about love, not war. The problem arises from the fact that you have acted without any awareness of your feelings. You broke up with a woman who you apparently still love.

    She spent the day with one ex and you want her to spend all of her time with you, another ex. From her perspective, why should she do that?

    Going back to an ex is usually a mistake unless you broke up for reasons unrelated to the quality of the relationship (like the two of you moved to different cities/states for school.) However, your only chance is to go to her, confess your feelings, and ask for another chance. . . but don't be surprised if she says "no."

    Learn a lesson from this experience. Don't be afraid to know what is in your heart and don't make decisions about a relationship unless you do know your true feelings.

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    • Well I didn't add this in the desription for space purposes but the reason I broke up with her initially wass because I had to focus on school more, and I found myself devoting too much time to the relationship. Also we sort of grew apart because she was overseas for two months so the connection didn't come back but we still had some feelings. And also Im in no way expecting her to spend all her time with me, It was just this day. I thought she would want to spend it with me from all of the messaging and stuff after our break up

    • If you were spending too much time on the relationship, you could have pulled back some without breaking up with her. Think about how that made her feel.

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