Do men feel hurt the same as women?

Do men feel hurt the same way as women , are some men sensitive like care a lot. Do they get emoitnal but hide it? If so why do they hide this stuff?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • i think yes, but we just have a different way of showing it, sometimes we get angry or we shut our selves of from the world, by doing stuff on our own. When my ex girlfriend miscarried our child at 5 weeks, she was crying , along with her 8 yo daughter, while they were sitting next to me. I felt really bad and i felt hurt as well but i told myself that i had to be strong for them. progressively my ex girlfriend became very hateful towards me, and a month later she left me. She never wanted to talk about it, or about us and left me without any closure. Till then i never cried a tear, when she left me i was really angry, mostly because i didn't know what i had done wrong. i've tried to help her the best way i could. I wasn't agressive to her even if she didn't wanted to talk and acted very hateful. i then lost my job as well, we worked at the same place and there was just a bad atmosphere. She resigned first but when she found out i lost my job she came back, she still works there now. So i lost a child, my girlfriend, my job and had to give up my appartment. At home , i can remember , i just began to cry, i felt so bad, i lost a child, and the woman i loved. I had been manning up for so long till it finally struck me, that everything i worked for was gone. now im doing fine, yes i still think about and i will always think about it but in a different context. i won't let her controll my life, she doesn't deserve it.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Men dont show emotion bc they do not want women to laugh at them.,

    women hide emotion bc they do not want men to kill them.

    everyone has pressure to hide or appear to have control over their feelings.

    he difference is men do not get attacked for emotions when they do not show them. women get attacked for emotions whether they show them or not.

    it is not more 'ok' for women to be emotional in the sense of consequence, they actually get disrespected degraded demeaned beat up raped ostracized controlled , with the underlying excuse that they are emotional and therefore anything they do is ultimately somewhere inappropriate and needs a male hand., it is 'ok' socially for women to be emotional outwardly bc they are already considered inferior... their dignity has no where to fall. but a woman can n t climb out of this dark hole simply by acting strong stronger than a man bc she's still a 'woman'. and being a woman comes with many threats. the excuse is always women are women after all.

    men face some disgrace from being emotional outwardly, but only to the extent they fall down to a woman's level. and they can climb out by simply acting differently.

    men have much less at stake by showing their emotions. some hide them some do not. the ones that do in my opinion do it moire out of a pleasure of feeling superior other than any real 'need';. to protect themselves. they do not get killed or raped or fired bc they got caught off guard once or twice. thy just get a little embarrassed.

    in any case men tend to react more internally to emotional stimuli they just do it in forms that are not 'called' emotional even though thats prosily what it is by definition. yelling rage fighting getting insulted offered indignation--these are all 'emotions' ands men engage in them, and publicly more often than women fight or 'cry';.

    as for a guy not telling you how he feels. if he feels anything and he's withholding its to hold p;over over you. if he feels nothing an onset tell you its to hold over over you. you seem to not feel confident in making him about it. probably bc women are punished for raising such topics... they get slated as despite needy emotional. clingy. you're on here asking about him bc girl you can't. bc you'll be under attack. as a womAn. this is A form of 'hiding' feelings. you are hiding your concern.

    to be direct in this case would be seen as 'emotional' not as logical bc you're a woman. if you were a man you'd be expected to say something..

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    • bc its 'logical'

      women hooded their feelings ALL the time,. that is why gag is full of these types of questions. not bc women think about these things more or feel them more but bc they are discriminated upon much more by raising them with a man in question. so they do not say anything to maintain 'integrity' based on being silent... . the is this is 'hiding' your feelings.

      then of course he get attacked for being 'complicated' this is a very neatly held conveniently cultivated vicious circle.

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What Guys Said 16

  • Well, yes. Having a Y chromosome doesn't preclude you from having access to the full spectrum of emotions. It's the way we're conditioned that narrows our emotional range.

    You have to understand that males are brought up from early childhood on not to show weakness. Boys and men who show hurt, sensitivity, vulnerability or other un-masculine things are shamed and coerced into being manly. We aren't socially permitted to express these things. Most men have repressed these emotions to the point where we can't even feel them by adulthood and what happens a lot is that these repressed emotions find other ways to express themselves - like anger and rage. We can hide emotions even from ourselves.

    Women don't usually get that kind of emotional baggage because they're permitted to feel and express their hurt and vulnerability.

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    • not really. they are shamed belittled demeaned degraded beaten abused raped murdered... for being 'emotional'.

      there's no less senscorship it just tastes different forms. women are called emotional as women and all treatment and obstructions are attributed to that 'fact'. so a woman has to spend her life fighting against a stereotype that preceded her birth. a guy just has to make sure he doesn't slip into the stereotype of 'woman'.

      i really think guys dont get how much pressure women are under constantly 24/7 to thwart incessant attack based on supposed' emotionality'

      i not saying its easy for guys, but at least if you dont show emotion you're respected. women are disrespected regardless of their actions and have to be twice as hard as men just to possibly not be labeled weak, though even then hell be labeled something else. and through it all theyll still face threat just for being a woman.

    • men are trained not to show emotion bc it will disgrace them, they might get called 'women'.

      women are trained not to show emotion bc they might get killed for 'being' women.

  • I'd say I'm pretty sensitive in general and tend to feel hurt by things more often than most men, at least probably more often than most men would readily admit to, but I don't hide it...

    It is what it is I guess, to me it feels like lying if I were to hide it. I don't really understand why one would hide stuff like that though... If it bothers you and you feel that it has had an appreciable, negative impact on you then you should say so... Right?

    I'm not saying go out and start a national debate every time your feelings get hurt, but talk to the person (s) involved and deal with it, sweeping emotional issues under the rug because it's "not manly" to whine about these things is a very thin line to causing yourself some serious damage emotional stability concerns down the road and by the time you do get to it, it might require far more time to sort out than you have left...

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  • Even the toughest guy gets hurt. And when I say hurt I mean every bit as bad as a woman. We're just not allowed to show it. Most of us go somewhere alone and deal with it there. I got told my dad had died over the phone and I had to hang up. It was like an explosion in my chest and stomach. I couldn't get off my knees for over an hour. I was alone at the time. Guys don't like to show any chinks in the armour that can be used against them later. Family and friends dying and women trouble are ones that really get us.

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    • I like this.
      But i was in a situation where me and this guy was very close and was probably considering more than friends.
      He always told me how he was afraid to loose me.. Right after i get mad at something.

      He lied to me about something and he was all over social media venting.. Especially on twitter. So what do you have to say about something like this?

    • @FlutteringFeelings it's apples and oranges. He's just a daft wee boy in a shitty time in human history. Fb, twitter, all that crap is anti-social not social. Some young guys are messed up when they're that age with hormones and don't have a clue what the hell to do in situations. Women just scream and shout and cry. Guys can't do that. Not allowed. If we never fucked up we'd die as naive as when we were born

  • I am not really sure but what you are saying can very well be a possibility. Yes

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  • i mean i don't get butthurt and upset if someone says it looks like i gained 3lbs if that's what you mean

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  • We feel the same pain but more often than not we manage it differently. We hide it because we do not like allowing it to dominate our lives. We're conditioned to take charge, resolve problems, and remain strong in times of adversity.

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    • hiding pain has nothing to do with taking control.

  • We hide it because we get judged for expressing sadness.

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  • As in a break up? Yes, we do. Make no mistake we do, we just are very private and hide it.

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  • Hell yeah we do, i am still gettin over the rejection of this girl that i truly liked. It has being 6 months and i still haven't got over her.

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  • Because of the women who claim that "they want a REAL man", and masculinity also includes stoicity.

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  • No. Men don't even know how to spell "Emotional Trayma".

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  • Yes, but I think we move on faster in general.

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  • yes the do... the get emotional and cry inside

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  • Yes, they get emotional. Yes, they hide it. They hide it because if they don't 1) women will be less attracted to them 2) other men won't respect them 3) people will start to treat them poorly, including employers.

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  • I am hurting real bad right now. Taken me nearly a year to get back to my normal self. I still think about her though. I kinda hide it to most people but inside my heart is bleeding

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  • Men don't have the same support system that women take for granted. Men are mocked for our pain. It isn't something we can show to just anyone. Guys often don't even tell anyone when they are sick, until they are so sick they can't even move. Then even our wives will call us babies.

    It is easy for people to say they are okay with men showing pain and weakness. When put into action however we see that people are clearly not okay with it. I have a friend was in so much pain he couldn't even sign his name. For several months before everyone in his life just kept telling him suck it up, go for walks, work through the pain. It turns out he has rheumatoid arthritis a serious medical issue that you can't deal with on your own. If a woman had been through that same pain, people would have been more likely to take her pain seriously, instead of expecting her to take care of it on her own.

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What Girls Said 5

  • Yes they do, but society generally has put pressure on men for centuries to not be overly emotional because that was supposed to be a 'female' trait. As a result lots of guys hide their emotions and try not to be around anyone when they are emotional. We are all human, we all feel disappointment and sadness; sex does not excuse us from any emotion.

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    • and as a result women ere beaten imprisoned raped burned tortured tossed out prostituted passed from man to man never having control over anything including herself.. exactly what did not happen to women over centuries while being emotional was 'ok'.

  • they hide it because... maybe that's how they prefer to deal with it? i dunno. i think they're onto something. crying is a waste of time and energy.

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  • YES THEY DO!

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  • Yeah. We are all human. We all deal with it differently, but yeah.

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  • They tend to hide their hurt, but the hurt doesn't seem to last as long as a woman s , because men move on easier and quicker than women.

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