Ex wants to be friends but our conversations haven't changed?

The way he talks to me through text is exactly the same is how we used to talk before the breakup. I don't understand why he'd treat me and talk to me in the same way when he broke up with me because he doesn't feel he's in the right place in life for a relationship yet.

Is it a sign he doesn't want to let the relationship go fully?

We've agreed to be friends but I've been very upfront about the fact that I want to date again once his life is in order and he seemed like he was willing to try again. I asked about casual dating and he said he'd give it some serious consideration, but for now we should stay friends.

But now that we're talking through text every day like we used to it hardly feels like we're not in the relationship at all. Everything is exactly how it used to be except I can't tell him I love him and stuff. :/


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What Guys Said 1

  • Wait, why are you waiting for his life to be in order exactly?

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    • Because he's just started college and he just wants some space to figure things out. We both decided we'd like to date again but neither of us can afford to wait around for each other in case someone really great comes along before he's got things all settled with himself.

      We were together for three years, and really great together, but the relationship ended due to circumstance, not no longer caring for each other.

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    • if you're looking for more detail--he's now an hour and a half away and devoting a lot of his time to his new fraternity. He feels as if he doesn't know himself well enough right now to know what he can put into a relationship and doesn't want to string me around until he knows he's doing his best. He needs to experience life for himself and figure himself out and thinks our relationship was a bit of a crutch because he could always rely on me to be there for him and reassure him he was worth something. We had a huge conversation about this whole thing about two weeks of no contact after the breakup.

    • I wasn't actually looking for more detail. I just thought it interesting.

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