Why does my ex seem so confused still?

My ex left me 4 months ago. A couple weeks after Thanksgiving she showed up at my house, and talked to me told me she started to miss me... But the day before she came over made a list on why "we shouldn't be together"... Then on Christmas she text me saying she had my stocking and a few ornaments of mine. Then told me merry Christmas and how her family misses me and talked about what a great guy I was at dinner.. Then 3 days after she deleted me off Facebook?

I am am confused by her actions. I accepted and respected she wanted to break up, and we agreed to be friends still since we were best friends. We have hung out with mutual friends and had a good time. I don't get why she is doing this? It's the 2 time she deleted me. Last time she re added me. Ladies have any of you did this hot and cold stuff?


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What Girls Said 2

  • She is confused... She is lonely, probably missing you and missing the affection you gave her. But that doesn't mean she wants to be together.
    Honestly? Give her time and don't mind much of her actions until she clearly says/shows what she wants. (If you have patience to wait).
    If you have enought of this "hot-and-cold" just ignore her... It will do you both good... Because it will give her time to think cleary about her actions and her decisions, and your heart will be free to find a new love.

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    • This is very true. I have not tried to contact her for a few months, she always text me or reaches out to me first. But it has been a few weeks now since we have talked. She is on vacation so I don't want her to think about me or is at all. Just to have a good time.

  • Don't even think about it for one more second, I've recently had a very similar Experaince to you , exept we were not freinds before , but we wanted to be freinds because we work togther and it was valuable in some way to still be okay. But the same thing that's happening to you was happening to me it went on for so long that the person I thought I'd never talk badly too I screamed at I snapped and it mentally and emiotonslly threw me. And now it's very sour I have left my job because I can't bear it. I would strongly suggest you keep you're boundaries in place don't let her mess with you. Keep it nice and short that way you save any good relationship you have and if she wants you back she will know that you could move on. Somtimes it takes a kick to make people realise and also protect you're feelings it's important

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    • Right. I'm sorry you had to go through a similar situation. Just so confusing because I do love this girl and I do want to remain on good terms and the friendship. But at the same time I don't deserve to be treated like this and played mind games with.

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    • That's probably best gives her time to miss you

    • Yes. Thanks for chatting.

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